Day 3 and doing much better thank you
Hi Kelly,
Thanks for the kind words,
To answer your question, the reason behind the breakup matters a lot to me. So for the initial breakup I was shaken, but if the reason was inevitable, something like us living in different cities and currently don't see anyway to have either one move( for me it was because after 2 years things just weren't as intense that either one of us would have something that attaches us to each other so much that we are willing to sacrifice for the other) then I can accept that more easily than the last two shocks I've gotten, which suggested worse reasons behind it. I was already starting to move on and doing well before I found out about the things I did.
I'm surprisingly doing much better on this third day. I suspect it's because of a number of things, first I allowed myself 1 day of grieving, just like you. Second, I'm not religious but I am spiritual and whenever I have a problem, that's when I turn to God and praying to Him, because, well, I have no one else to turn to, and it's always very comforting to now He's always listening, and it certainly doesn't hurt to ask Him for help :). Thirdly, I have been having such busy days full of activities and interaction with a variety of other people, that i just didn't have time to think and wallow about my situation.( don't know if this is just a temporary thing, before the inevitable comes, but it seems like it's holding up). Fourthly, having you guys reply here is such a big support as well, and I thank you all so much, because i think at some point, when you've told your story a few times, you'd feel like you've talked it up, and up to a certain point you just get tired of going back to those horrible memories making you feel like crap, and just stop feeling it- at least that's the way it is for me. So, you can try what I've tried these past 2 days I suppose? I hope they'll work for you as they have for me :)
Love,
Audy
Quote:
Did u struggle to get over him after you guys broke up initially ? The 1 month and 8 days.?
How u feeling today?
Thinking about you xxx
- - - Updated - - -
Thank you for the good wish, it seemed to work, I feel much better on this third day.
I feel you edd, especially if she cut all ties like that. When I broke up, i also had the fear of what if he found another person before I did and that would just be unthinkable. But now that I have had those multiple shocks in one day, and how I'm feeling much better on this third day, I find that you may think you can't handle it, but are a lot stronger than you think. You just need time to let it run its course. Being on this forum helps too. I suggest doing what i found worked for me as well to try and get over her. which was, take time for yourself, and when you're ready, go out and spend time with people and busy yourself with so many activities you don't have time to think and be sad anymore.
Best of luck.
Quote:
i also lost what i thought was the love of my life 1 month ago (long distance holland/poland).
yesterday she removed all happy memories we had from facebook, that hurted me but i cant image the horror of seeing her with a new guy, it would break my heart even more.
i wish you strength the comming time, youre not alone
- - - Updated - - -
Hello Hooo!,
Thank you so much for the reply, and the kind words. I was comforted to read your reply. I find your thoughts very helpful, and very true indeed, especially the part of me loving an outdated image of the guy. This was something i had never thought of, so thanks, it helps in me trying to reason with it all. i did take a day off, and it was definitely what i needed, to just let all the feelings run its course. Day 2 went much better, and today, the third day was even better.
About getting closure from him, i thought about doing it right after I was shocked out of my mind, but then, right now i'm deciding to just let it go. I'm on such a good progress streak, I don't really want to open up that wound again. Letting things be is probably the best course of action right now :)
But who knows, I might do that in the future if it happens that i should cross paths with him again. Hopefully by then I'd be happily off with a better guy that is deserving of me, just so I can spite him :P This couple of days I'm finding it helpful to just entertain thoughts of bad things happening to him, over and over again. haha.
Look at that, it's a heartbreak forum and I felt like a ghost of myself three days ago, but now i'm beginning to laugh at it. I would call that proof that progress is possible.
You've been a great help, thanks so much Hooo!
