Question about ex boyfriend

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06-02-13, 10:48 AM
Kskugirl

Question about ex boyfriend

I have known my ex boyfriend since I was in 2nd grade and we have always been friends. We dated for about a year in high school and even though it ended, it really didn't end bad and we have stayed friends. Every few years it seems like we reconnect and hang out for a while but we have never gotten back together.

Last year we reconnected and had lunch a few times and one night went to his house to watch movies. I ended up spending the night. Nothing sexual happened, we just made out, spooned, etc. after a really good night we didn't talk much or hang out for awhile.

A couple weeks ago I was thinking about him- he had an injury earlier this year- so I texted to see how he was. We ended up making plans to hang out the next night. Again I went to his house to watch movies.

He downloaded my favorite movie- a very girly one- and watched it by choice, he tinkled me, rubbed my leg and then held my hand. He asked me if I was going to spend the night, and I said I don't know am I, he said yes. Again- nothing sexual happened but he gave me a kiss good night and we cuddled all night, also at open point in the middle of the night he kissed my forehead and cheek.

We woke up the next morning and he had to do some work from home and I asked him if he wanted me to leave, he didn't so I hung out and watched a movie. Once he got done with his work he asked if I wanted to grab lunch, we both took a shower- separately- and went and grabbed lunch, of course he paid.

We went back to his house and hang for a bit before I headed home.

I ended up texting him later that day and told him I had a fun time and thanks for having me over, he agreed and said we needed to do it again soon.

Haven't talked to him since. I am just confused. I don't understand why we have such good nights, and he does such sweet things and I don't hear from him.

He is the guy I compare every other guy to and is the guy I thought I would end up with but I am 27- he is 28, and I hate wasting my time waiting for him but also don't want to be girly and needy.

Anyway- I need help, just any thoughts you have or advice would be appreciated.

Thank you!
06-02-13, 09:58 PM
Nice Lover Boy

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kskugirl [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

He is the guy I compare every other guy to and is the guy I thought I would end up with but I am 27- he is 28, and I hate wasting my time waiting for him but also don't want to be girly and needy.

I think if I heard this from the girl who really is interested in me, I'd give her an answer.
07-02-13, 10:42 AM
Kskugirl

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nice Lover Boy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I think if I heard this from the girl who really is interested in me, I'd give her an answer.

So I am just supposed to ask him?
07-02-13, 12:13 PM
basilandthyme

Yep, talk with him. We can make all the guesses in the world, but only he knows the truth of how he's feeling
07-02-13, 05:22 PM
jennifer.c

Sounds like he enjoys your company when you happen to be around and really does feel affectionately toward you, especially since you've known each other so long. Maybe he doesn't know what he feels - it all sounds so genuine and sweet when you do hang out and I'm sure he really means it, but when you're away it doesn't seem like he thinks of you as much as you think of him. Seems like he enjoys having someone deeply familiar like you to spend nights with and to keep him company, you know, a temporary fix to fill the void in his life a girlfriend or wife would normally occupy. But if he wanted to be with you for real, I feel like he'd try harder to see you...

I have no idea what his situation is, but I don't think you should waste your time just guessing. You should talk it out with him, ask him what you are, and if the answer is not positive, or if he just says something vague and non-committal, try and move on and date other guys.
07-02-13, 05:53 PM
Boisdevie

What I don't understand is why two adults share a bed twice and just cuddle. So you don't fancy each other sexually?
07-02-13, 08:04 PM
Kskugirl

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boisdevie [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

What I don't understand is why two adults share a bed twice and just cuddle. So you don't fancy each other sexually?

It's not that but I don't want to muddle the situation more then it already is. I am sure if I was willing he would be too.
07-02-13, 09:12 PM
Nice Lover Boy

So, when will you talk to him about what you need to ask him?
08-02-13, 07:31 AM
Kskugirl

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nice Lover Boy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

So, when will you talk to him about what you need to ask him?

No idea. Haven't talked in over two weeks except for him liking a few of my posts on Facebook so I don't know to randomly ask him anything. Or really even what to ask him.
08-02-13, 07:43 AM
vashti

Quote:

Originally Posted by jennifer.c [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Seems like he enjoys having someone deeply familiar like you to spend nights with and to keep him company, you know, a temporary fix to fill the void in his life a girlfriend or wife would normally occupy. But if he wanted to be with you for real, I feel like he'd try harder to see you...

Sorry to say it, but I agree with this. If he wanted you, there wouldn't be two weeks with no contact.
08-02-13, 09:48 AM
Kskugirl

Quote:

Originally Posted by vashti [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Sorry to say it, but I agree with this. If he wanted you, there wouldn't be two weeks with no contact.

I know that, and that really sucks- but I just don't understand why he does then things he does when we are together, whatever- maybe I should just get over it.