Hail to the King

"Damn, those alien bastards are gonna pay for shootin' up my ride!"

I was just an innocent little 13 year old kid when I first heard the above line. Just an innocent kid when I ripped off an alien's head and shat down its neck. Just 13 the first time I threw a wad of 20s at a stripper and leered at her pixelated tits. 13 the first time I smashed a toilet and drank from the ensuing geyser of water. 13 when I heard all the best movie lines before ever actually seeing any of the goddamn movies. "I'm here to chew gum and kick ass, and I'm all outta gum."

I have waited literally over half my lifetime for it. Duke Nukem Forever is going to be released in 2011. Old news to some of you. Most of you don't care. But for a newly-minted teen fresh out of Catholic school, Duke Nukem had a big impact on my life. Absurd, over-the-top testosterone. Violence, sex, steroids, guns. I loved it. Just like I love Machete and Planet Terror and all the absurd 80's flicks that inspired them and Duke Nukem.

If you think I'm an overcharged bundle of testosterone now, you just wait until next year. Cuz baby, I got balls of steel and if you got a problem with that you can blow it out your ass.

Yeh, Duke Nukem brings memories

Me too.

In fact, my friends and I are having a LAN party soon. We're going to play Duke3D from start to finish. It won't be the same without the Christian guilt.

Yeah. I was so confused by that. They were supposed to be tassels, though.

Eh.

I'll be playing Halo: Reach in the mean time.

me too ..:)