He Sleeps Over at His Ex-Wife's House
Please Advise!
I have been seeing a great guy for a bit over 1 year now and he referrers to me as his "girlfriend". We live separately, are both in our late 30's and we are both divorced... I have 2 children from my marriage and he has NO children from his. Our relationship has become very close and we spend weekends and any other free days together (when my children are with their father). I am truly hoping to be with him for the rest of my life... or I "was" hoping.
Now, I am not so sure...
He is very close with his ex-wife- they talk on the phone often (usually it is his ex-wife calling him- asking advice on her daily decisions etc.) He was the one that ended the marriage and she has not had a serious relationship since...it's been years since the split. She lives in another state.
Before I came into the picture, she would visit him in our city and stay at his home...now when she comes to town she stays in a hotel. However, when he goes to visit her he sleeps over at her home...sometimes for extended periods of time. Just this summer he stayed with her for 3 WEEKS.... he was laid off at work and she provided him with work around her house. I was not at all comfortable with this situation, but tried to be understanding and supportive because of the financial necessity involved.
Here is my problem:
They share custody of the two dogs they adopted during their marriage, both of them are very attached to these dogs and trade them back and forth (hence all the visits between them).
Sadly, one of their beloved dogs died just days ago.
I rushed to his side and tried to comfort him... while I was there, he informed me that his ex-wife had purchased him a plane ticket and he would be staying with her for 5 days.
This feels unacceptable to me because the reason for staying with his ex-wife has changed from necessity to "emotional reasons". They will be supporting and comforting each other and there is no place at all for me to fit into the picture. I feel hurt and utterly like a third wheel in this relationship
I think this might be a deal-breaker.... am I overreacting???