My girlfriend, whom I'm engaged to, violated my trust tonight. We were in the midst of foreplay, and she bent down and licked my penis.
I have made it clear to her in the past that I don't believe in oral sex based on religious beliefs. (Please don't judge me, saying I'm having pre-marital sex, I know that.) I'm also a germaphobe, and that grosses me out. (And I don't need anyone making fun of me because I don't believe in oral sex.)
After she did that, I was mortified. I almost instantly lost my erection, and was in too much shock to really say or do anything. She got frustrated because I lost the mood to do it, then tried to give me a guilt trip about how she always tries to give me sex, and I get frustrated over it. (Yesterday she had gas that ruined it.)
I told her that she violated me and broke my trust. She said she feels bad.
I tried to let it go, but the more I think about it, the more that it eats away at me. She had to go home, so I'm stuck here alone in my thoughts.
I love her, I want to forgive her, but I honestly feel violated, and it's hard to shake it.