Hey guys, give me some insight here. I am recently divorced. I was attracted to a guy who was a coach in my sons baseball league, he was single and sexy, so I made contact with him....we had never met each other before this even though we have always lived in the same town. He is not the type I look for....I am a well educated professional working woman. He is a tattooed bad boy with a temp job, no real future and a felony record...but is SO sexy. What he does have going for him, that was also sexy, is he is a single Dad and a coach. I really admired the way he was with the kids, that was important to me. We texted for a week while he was on vacation and had good conversation. We met up at his place once he was back and one thing led to another. Everything seemed ok, I guess, we texted and hooked up a few more times and I really started to like him, no, I fell in love with him...we had never been out of his bed, our interaction was purely sexual. I told him how I felt and without warning, he told me he never wanted a relationship, just FWB. He said he didn't have feelings for me, that I was not his type, but the sex was good. He has been hurt quite a bit in the past, so I took that as he was keeping me at arms length so he doesn't get hurt again. Being married, I never really got into or understood how FWB works and I never expected to run into it from a 40 year old single Dad.
We basically fought about this for 2 months...I insisted he really had feelings, he insisted he didn't and it was all about the booty call. He said he hates drama and that's what women are, he wanted no part of it. We kept hooking up for a few months, me thinking I could change his mind. We had a major blowout yesterday where I found out that he basically has a list of a few women that are friends, that he has known for awhile, that aren't looking for relationships either, that he will text occasionally just for sex. I guess I was supposed to be one of them??
My question to the guys is....if he didn't want anything more with me, why did he continue to see me when he knew I had feelings for him? Isn't that when you walk away from FWB? Why did he put up with my drama if he hates it? He could have not texted me back, he could have ended it. He had other FWB that would have satisfied him, yet even though I'm not his type and I broke his rules, he still came to me. I asked him straight up if there was anything more...he said he didn't want to answer because he wasn't 100% sure.....then the next day he went back to "I'll text you if I need sex, if I don't text you that means I got it somewhere else" This is confusing....I'll admit, I was a willing participant, but why would he mess with my feelings like that? Why, if he has an arsenal or more suitable chicks to bang, would he come to the only one who had feelings for him?
Need to know if I missed something....is FWB with me his way of shutting me out emotionally or is he serious and I am just delusional?