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well, answer to ur opinion
ques 1 ) What do u think of getting engaged early? will it do more harm or more good?
ques 2) Getting married early, will it affect the relationship
ques 3) will marrige help save a relationship that is already breaking up?
Marraige is something you should do to solidify and celebrate a relationship - it won't save one that isn't working.
i think marriage will riun a relationship that is breaking up....besides do u want to spend the rest of ur life married to someoen u wanted to let go?....and i dont think its a matter of age thats importand but matuity
Fully agree with above quote.Quote:
i think marriage will riun a relationship that is breaking up....besides do u want to spend the rest of ur life married to someoen u wanted to let go?....and i dont think its a matter of age thats importand but matuity
Sometimes age isn't always the case. But if you marry too young, the relationship might grow apart as you get older.
My parents were both 19-20 when they married. They were engaged for about 3-6mths or so before they married. They've been married for 30 yrs now and still going.
i guess my question is why would you want to do this?? me and my bf have been together for 6 years. we were still kids when we met, but i think it would have been a mistake to get married anytime before now. i am ready to now-we are on solid ground and things are good. do not get married to try to fix your relationship-it will not work.
ques 1 ) I don't think age is a question with engagement... I think with anything having to do with love, it depends on the people involved and the motives behind the relationship. Age has nothing to do with it... Maturity has EVERYTHING to do with it. (and THINKING you're mature is not the same thing as BEING mature)
ques 2) Again, it depends on the people and the relationship. I don't know of any couples who have gotten married where both people were "young" as in minors... I guess I don't know how young "young" is to you. My brother and has wife got engaged at 19 and married at 20. They have had some serious struggles with immaturity, but I know that if they were more mature they'd be fine.
ques 3) Everyone else is right. If the relationship isn't working, then that person obviously isn't the one you should be spending your life with. Why try to prolong the innevitable? Sorry if this offends anyone, but getting married to "save" a dying relationship is a desperate act.
relationship that is not working means no saving. hmmmm, not worth saving eh? cuz i know someone who is planning to marry the girl in order to find the love that was once lost.
[edited: there was a typo XP]
luvtif>> hmmmm, well, some of them feel that they will feel much more secure with the other partner (that's what my bf said) both will feel that they have been tied up and they can't run away as they are tied down by responsibilities
PA Girl 7 >> Well, my opinion of young is 18 years old or less.
What a stupid ****ing question.Quote:
Originally Posted by kanzaki
Ask yourself this:
Will spraying a burning house with benzyne help calm the fire?
Dude, logic, please.
I wish all love was like that. It's so tragic that it can run out. But I think apathy is something that will take a while to disappear from humanity.Quote:
Originally Posted by Fawn
No one said it is not worth saving. What we are saying is that marriage is not the solution.Quote:
Originally Posted by kanzaki
mvplayer>> well, bcuz like i said b4, i know few friends who actually marry the other partner bcuz they want to save the dying love from her to him.
rada>> well, i do hope so. U do know in our parents world, they used to live in a world where the parents arrage the marrige for them. They will only meet their husband/wife on the marrige NIGHT!
kristy>> well, marrige is not a solution? But y not?
What do you think marriage will add to your relationship which might save it?
Marraige is only a wonderful thing to couples in love who want to spend the rest of their lives together. For a dying relationship, it is much more likely to kill the relationship than save it.
Since you didn't specify I'm going to answer as though you were a girl (which is what I'm assuming)
1) I think it's stupid to get engaged early. We are still developing as "people" in our early lives. I can tell you that I am FAR from the person I was four years ago when I just graduated high school. And I know that I still have a lot of changing to do. You might make an argument saying, "Oh, but then we can change together." Sure, it sounds good on paper, but what happens when a choice comes up and you guys are naturally pulled in opposite directions. One wants a condo, one wants a house. One wants pets, the other wants kids first. One gets a great offer for a job that requires relocating and the other wants to stay close to their family. There's a lot of choices and decisions in life AND career that I feel should be answered first before looking for a lifetime partner.
2) Of course it will. Getting married at ANY point affects the relationship. What happens when you're married and you want to go clubbing with your friends? How will your partner react? How will you react when you're getting hit on by hot guys and all you can say is "Sorry. I'm married". How are you going to react when they say, "That's ok with me." Are you going to give up clubbing to avoid the situation? Are you going to just have to stop every guy from grinding on you for the rest of your youth? Are you going to one day give in to the temptation and have a fling? And that's just clubbing. There's LOTS of stuff for single young people to do that maybe isn't smart or 'appropriate' for a married woman to do.
3) If you're putting money into the stock market, and it looks like it's on the verge of crashing, do you liquidate your assets and put as much as you can in right before the crashing point? If you're driving a car and you hit a patch of ice and start to slip do you mash on the gas and hope it'll work out?
If you're thinking about 'saving' a dying relationship, sure you can try some drastic things, but don't do something stupid that won't leave you a backdoor in case things get even shittier. That means no moving in together, no getting pregnant, and NO MARRIAGE. You might want to start with a romantic weekend away and see how things go before signing a legal document binding you together until either they 'come around' or you end up 'divorced' with a wonderful lawsuit dividing up any possessions and all that added stress. At which case you'll probably say, "Damn. Getting married to try to save this was a STUPID thing to do."
Rod Steele