She loves me but is not ready to have a relationship!!!!

My girl told me that she liked me and I knew that I liked her so we went out for a while but we decided that for right now it would be best if we didnt put any name on our relationship. We talked on the phon all the time every day for about 4-6 hours each night. She called me all the time and always wanted to talk and one night the subject came up about the time that i went down on her. I told her how i had wanted to waite untill we loved eachother but that i supposed at the time that it didnt matter. She told me that she did love me. So we have been telling each other how much we miss each other and how much we love each other. Well one last night I see her and we kind of make out, we hug and I hold her alot and she always puts my hands around her waiste. It was really nice just to be around her but then when i got home last night she had changed he rmind I guess. She told me she wasn't ready to be in a relationship but that we could reamian friends and that we could still act like we had with the hugging and snuggling and kissing but that I just needed to face the fact that for right now we wouldnt date. She even told me she wanted us to have oral sex still. She said she loved me several times and then said some other stuff about how we will always be friends and how it may be a while before she is ready to have a serious relationship with me. I dont understand though because just the night before we told each other how there was no one else right now that we would even want to consider dating and even how we wanted to have sex with each other for our first times. But it just ended so suddenly that I have no idea if she just got scared or what. I just dont know what to do or what she wants me to do. If she is scared or just trying to see how much I like her or what. So any help that anyone could offer me I would greatly appreciate it. It doesnt even need to be help it can just be your opinion and thoughts I just need something. :(

Sounds very odd that her feelings would shift so suddenly. Did something major happen in her life? Or is she eyeing someone else? Just based on what you've said it kind of seems like she wants you to be around for support and for pleasure while she endeavors to explore other oppurtunities. I most certainly could be wrong, but it just doesn't make sense to run away from the relationship while still wanting physical contact. My advice would be to just ask. Bring up how you feel and how you don't understand what's going on and try to get her to be honest with you about what's going on. If she's just saying she's not ready or scared then start looking elsewhere. I know how you feel and the love you hold, but I've set myself on hold for someone like that and all I ended up doing was waiting, and no one deserves that. Hope I helped a little. Keep me updated.

Dude, I don't know, but it sounds like this girl has some personal issues. She may have been heart-broken before. It seems very odd that she would suddenly shift like that. In my eyes, I can see only two reasons for that:
1) She has become afraid (of some past broken-heart issue) and has backed off to a "safe" distance, which I think she calls "just being friends." When people are 'just' friends, you can't get hurt like you do when you are in 'love.'
2) Or, she was initially too weak to tell you how she truly felt. Maybe she first had to get in behind your 'wall.' Maybe she was only after a piece ?

My advice: Talk to her. Be persistent. Sometimes all you have to do is ask a few times, and the "baggage" (problems/issues) as I like to put it, will start to pour out.

Good luck my friend,

Chafie :baby:

here's an angle. maybe she's isn't ready for be in a relationship so serious, dealing with so strong emotions. but hey, sex is always a good thing and damn it feels great. if she can have stimulation without the commitment, then what is there to lose? both of you can fool around, and say you love each other and what not, while on the verge to see other people. both of you won't mention that you're errrrr, she won't have to mention when she's interested in other people, it will just happen. raverboy

Illusion, it aint' gonna work if he is in love. The sex will feel hollow, and he will therefore end up feeling used & abused.

Sounds like she felt pressured into having sex with you and left the relationship because she wasn't ready for sex.

ice, i don't think she felt as though she was being pressured into sex because she told him they could still have sex. i think more so, she is looking for an ftf right now and nothing serious. raverboy

No, she said that stuff about sex the night before, then the backpedaling began.

What's ftf?

ftf is friends that ****, or people also refer to them as friends with benefits. raverboy

How old are the two of you? Because she may not want to be in a relationship because of the fact that she is young and still wants to experiment with other people. I'm sure she really cares about you and if something ever happend with her and another guy then she wouldn't want you to be hurt by that. So if you guys aren't officially going out then she may feel that you wouldn't be hurt by that. Hope this helps a little bit.

Braxton..... I am sorry to say it.... but your being played.... I would know.... bcuz i have done the same things to quite a few men.... but just recently Karma came back and bit me in the ass! Leave her... tell her she isnt good enough for you, and that you want to be with someone who wants to be with you, and you only... In an EXCLUSIVE RELATIONSHIP! dont worry... you'll soon meet someone who is way better then her, and then you'll be thinkin, "why did i ever put up with her shit"! Your worth more then that!