How can I get closer to her?

Hello, I'll try to keep this as short as possible.

I started talking to a girl online, and we got along pretty well. However, being online, any time she seemed to falter or cancel on meetings, I got nervous and it made me a bit insecure about her. This caused her to become a little more distant. We finally were able to meet, but we've only hung out a couple times over a couple months. We also don't seem to talk as much, though I know she's got a hectic schedule. Does anyone have advice on how to try to talk/spend time with her more? I know she thinks of me as a friend, otherwise she wouldn't bother with me at all, but I want to try to get to know each other better, and hopefully that might turn into something. I dont want to constantly text her and bug her, because I know that will just push her away. I'm not exactly great with flirting or "having game" so I don't really know how to gain her interest more than I have.

Thanks!

Why don't you ask her out? If she says yes, well and good. If she declines, oh well, find someone else since she only sees you as a friend anyway.

However it turns out, best of luck.

I'd listen to chinagirl. There's no harm is asking her out and seeing what happens. And like she said above, if the girl you're interested in says no, then just take it with a grain of salt and go find someone else to start dating.

how old are you two?

We are both 27. The only thing is, I left this out earlier, she got divorced awhile back. Not sure how long ago, maybe a year or so. So I know she is enjoying being single. So I don't want to pressure her into dating, but I'd like to try to get to know her better as friends, and hope that it can turn into something...but I don't know how to do that without coming across as clingy or needy

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Originally Posted by safari [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

We are both 27. The only thing is, I left this out earlier, she got divorced awhile back. Not sure how long ago, maybe a year or so. So I know she is enjoying being single. So I don't want to pressure her into dating, but I'd like to try to get to know her better as friends, and hope that it can turn into something...but I don't know how to do that without coming across as clingy or needy

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Dude, chances are before you have thought about being friends as a way to get to her heart you have already been friend zoned! Grow a pair, ask her out, enjoy your happy ending!

Otherwise you can consider yourself playing the "gay male girlfriend" role as long as you two are in contact and she will never see you as any more than that.

Agreed! Ask her out, then you know where you stand with her. It's evident that you both get along well, so give it a go. Good luck to you.

I agree also. I don't know why some men think that becoming friends first is the best approach. To me, this just conveys two things: 1) You don't know how you feel about me or 2) You're kind of wuss. Neither one are really worth waiting for. I want someone who's resolved to be with me and not too insecure to follow through.

Take your time with her, I doubt she's friend-zoned you. If she enjoys your company, then go with the flow, no need to rush life. Have a conversation with her soon though, if it will make you feel better. Tell her how you feel about her, only you two will be able to answer each other's questions. Nothing needy about expressing feelings, not at all. The best relationships are those with a solid foundation of friendship. You're doing everything right, good luck!