She lives a busy life, little time for relationship, but starts to plan trips w/o me
So, you might see another post from me, rather than have a super long one, i figured to break down into chunks because some of the issues go into a segway of other deeper topics.
My g/f and I have been very distant, she's going through some rough financial times and work schedule fluctuates.. she has to spend her time with her kids as much as she can.. full time single mom. Right now she's emotionally distant. Rather than be selfish and pout, i bite my lip and fulfill her personal needs, take the weight off, i bend over backwards: pick up the kids from school, lend money when bills are late, come over when she's not feeling well yet still wants to be distant. i become a self-less servant. She is my priority. I know my return on investment will say "give her time to make her children and finances priority, and I will follow when the dust settles"
Out of no where, she has a free moment in her time and tells me about a trip she wants to take in the next few weeks. Granted, her and I have not had a chance to spend quality time to each other, i'm thinking this is great, a chance to get away with my girl and spend some time with her......... it was an all girls trip. I felt instantly bummed, the effort I put in had vanished. As it's easy to say that she's taken advantage of me, her recent expressed fear is "Losing me".
I'm really confused... in a few elaborate love letters she's expressed how she will give me her all, and loves me dearly, her next break in time i'm not in the picture... it makes me feel like we're in a long distant relationship, or sadly (my insecurity speaking) am i just the love-option? the Mr. On-call?
Have I made someone my priority while they made me their option?