I need advice please im very lonely

I was with my ex-girlfriend for 14 months, from the beginning she lied. Firstly about her age, then she texted me randomly saying "babe enjoying your meal?" i wasnt at a meal, so obviously it was for another lad, she denied this but because it was the start of the relationship i gave her another chance.
Then i find out she was using facebook to talk to guys, she planned to go down town with one guy for his birthday, she never told me about it. Then she told a guy that she misses the old times. This was when i thought we were strong and planning a future together, so when i found this out it destroyed me. After that i would constant worry all day and accuse her because of that. We were going round in circles.

Then somehow we got back on track and things were fine, she promised not to lie again, but she did. She lied to my face and we had a massive argument and i ended it, we broke up for a few days then i took her back. She promised to never lie again and i honestly thought she wouldnt. not even a week later and she lied to my face again the exact same lie as before, at first she accused somebody else then she denied it for ages then finally she admitted it. This killed me she promised to never lie again but she did. I ended it there and then.

So its been a week since i saw her, i have been blanking her because im so upset for her lying. Im really sensitive, im different to most guys, since we broke up i havent been out or spoke to anyone. Then 2 nights ago me and my ex started texting again, things were going fine texting back and fourth then she randomly stopped texting me and claims to fall alseep. My head went because she lied before so i was sat there all night thinking she up to something, already.
Then the next morning somehow we start talking again, dont ask me why but i say i wanna try again do u wanna meet later, but as soon as i do she says oh im going to my sisters for a meal, but she never told me about the meal until i asked to meet her, i honestly dont believe a word she says anymore, i question everything.

Then last night was the final straw, i had a terrible day, alone, no one to talk to thinking all these horrible thoughts, so i text my ex girl friend and we start talking, i couldnt hold it in anymore so i broke down in a big way, pouring my heart out saying all these things but her reply was pathetic, it was like she didnt wanna talk to me, and she took ages to reply also, it made me feel so horrible for opening up because i thought she would comfort me but she did the opposite. Im a mess right now i dont know were to turn or anything, she out having fun while im sitting around. She hasnt even tried to comfort me for last night. I texted her this morning basically saying what i just said and also i said leave me alone forever delete my number.

i dont know why im here i just need some advice, please if you feel the need to be mean or whatever, dont reply because im in such a mess :(

Quote:

i honestly dont believe a word she says anymore, i question everything.

Then why on earth would you even want to talk to her again never mind trust her with your heart?

You're hurting right now because you've just discovered that she's not the person you thought she was and you've come to realize that staying with her would just mean more and more mis-trust, lying, pain for you. Unfortunatly your heart hasn't quite caught up with your logical side yet.. but it will in time.

Do yourself a favor and do your very best to stop pining away for a girl that disrespected you, lied to your face repeatedly, and manipulated your emotions to suit her without reciprocating when you needed her.

Pfffft.

Why stay in this morose mood for very long over someone like her? You deserve better and you'll certainly find better if you make the mental effort to let go of her.

Don't ever contact her again. If she contact you, please ignore her. You deserves better and she's just playing around.
All she will do to you is hurt your feelings so don't talk to her.

Go out and meet new people. Go out with your friends and move on.

Don't be so sensitive about her. try to ignore her. She broke your trust. So don't trust her again.

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I know its going to be tough but go ghost. No contact, even if she calls don't pick up. Don't respond to text messages. Nothing.

Im 19 now when i was 17 i started dating a girl...6 months later she was pregnant....We were in love and everything was perfect...Before her and during our relationship i have always had problems with drugs..she smoked n drank before i met her...So naturally we would get
high" together..during her pregnancy she moved in with me because her mom moved to fl and she doesn get along wit heer dad. Thing started off good but over time spending everyday together all day since we met started takin a toll.I told her we both need time away from eachother sometimes just so we had a balance and had time apart miss eachother. She didnt have many friends and didnt understand why i felt like that.So i would hangout with friends instead of her and she took it as i chose them over her and didnt care about her or want her...This is when thnigs started going bad...we fought alot and after about a month or two she moved out...about a couple weeks later she moved in and the same cycle happened she moved out....I was at this time and had been doing heroin and obviously i kept it a secret from her...So i was lying alot and making exscuses to leave to get high because i was dopesick. We were fighting almost everyday about me hangin out with friends and her thinkin i didnt want her..(which i would say out of the 100 somethin hours in a week i spend about 75 of them with her) that was not enough....we had our baby and it was a new start she moved back in and shit was good ...i was still using however i cut back on my friend time after a few weeks of the baby being born i would hangou with friends 1-2 a week for a few hours.....She was not working and i was so sometimes i would go to a friends for a few hours after work before i came home..To her this was the worst thing ever n she felt i was abandoning myy family...this kept going ..good days and bad days....one night i told her i was doing heroin and tried explaining thats why i was hiding alot and seeming sketchy...she thought i was cheating.. we both cried and she said she didnt want me doing that n so on... I quit for a month due to my family... i relapsed and at some point steph wanted to try heroin..(i guess out of curiosity and what was making me so withdrawn) I told her no and that lead to fights and eventually one day i caved in and let her ... she did it a few times and at the same time we got nto a huge fight one day n cops came n everything and she moved out....we made up but decided to take a break and we would move to fl.//.a few days later her n my daughter drove to fl from VA ..I felt empty when they left and felt horrible ...she was there for almost a month when i talked her into mocing back in with me....she came back and again things were great i told her i had been clean and would get a job because i was unemployed at this time n she was working . Really i wasnt clean entirely i jus wasnt using as much ... Again this didnt work we got into a big fight which led to gettin physical she scratched n hit me and n i did grab her n push her away ..(this was the first time i touched her that way, but she has hit me many times before..and had always been violent n have alot of anger problems) .....This is where it really starts....so we broke up and i knew it was real this time... she moved out n into her dads house ...two days later i got a call saying she was kicked out because she slept out one night...i came to get her and it was somesort of make up... That night she left and stayed at a hotel with a guy from her work..i met him before ...she stayed wit him in the hotel for 2 nights and even didnt come see me n our daughter for thanksgiving....I felt like there was no way she was not ****ing this guy or she was not interested in him.she swore it wasnt like that he was jus paying for half...she stayed the night with this guy for almost a week ....we hung out a couple times n had sex and one time we were dirnkin n began having sex n i felt like her vagina was swollen like she jus had sex or something...i acused her n it led to a fight that really eneded everything...to this day they both say nothing happened......so a weeks pass and i didnt see my daughter n barely spoke to her...we slowly started seein eachother n shed bring my daughter for a little bit...we started hanging out gaain and shit seemed good we went to the gym together n did new things..at this point i was clean and she was too..(i thought) .. But one day we were suppose to meet at the gym and she said idk yet i want to but idk and never jus hung up...me being paranoid n not havin any trust for her grew suspicious went to her house n her car was gone..i came home n called her over n over n she finally answered sayin im not goin im stayin home...so i called her out n found out she was wit the guy she stayed at the hotel with....at this pont i thought she is deffintly involved with him n its over...on her birthday she came to get her present n was rushin sayin she was meetin her friend a female for dinner i didnt beleive her for some reason...about a week later i talk to her friend and she said she hasnt talked to her in a while..another lie.....then one night she was rushing to leave my house saying she had to be home ...n then i find out when she got home she left and she said it was to meet her girlfreinds for dinner n a movie... I later again ran into her friend n asked n that was untrue.....When i called her out on all the lies she quickly grew angry and basically said were not together i can do whatever i want...n i simply replied whats the point of lying about everything then ...tell me how it is so i dont wait for u and shit.....around christmas she went to fl for the hoolidays for over 2 weeks ....before she left things seemed ok we hung out before she left and i felt like i was getting through to her....when she was gone suddenly again she started ignoring me n tellin me were done n never gonna talk again and all this ...when we were together things were perfect i could see her love..and as soon as she left she would act like we arent friends .....in fl she told me dont be surprised when i get a bf..i asked why do u have someone in mind .. she replied no but jus dont be surprised were not gettin together i mved on... she came back from i thought she was returnin on a certain day...the day aftyer i thought she was home i called so i could see my daughter...she asked if i wanted to go to dc with her..so i said yes we spent the whole day together n she even held my hand and everything...i noticed she was talkin to a guy alot on her phone and he had bought her a purse n shit....i knew who he was and he is 34 n she is 20 now and he is jus ugly honestly ...i had no reason to think anyting she said ew i could never kiss him ... when we got back i asked her if we could try workin on things she said no . i told u were jus friends and we got into a fight n she flipped out n said she cant talk to me anymore...we hung out the next week once or twice n it was ok but akward.....one day she picked me up to go somewhere with her she went into the bank n left her phone in the car...i looked at her texts due to my gut feeling something wasnt right...and sure enough the 34 year old guy buying her shit was her bf ....i called her out she grew angry n said get out my car yes im ****ing him n i like him i told u was over u....This was a huge surprise n hurt badly because i asked her to tell me if she started dating or hooking up with someone cus i deserve to kno so i can move on....she had been hiding it from me for the last month almost.....after that i did my best to not tlk to her and i didnt call her or anyting for about a week and she called me sayin she missed me n this n that..we hung out and shit was alright but ofcourse i was mad about her new bf .. we got in fights about it cus she wanted me to not ask questions and be friend but i cant be jus friends cus i love her still....so we continued hanging out n i felt like we were growing she sometimes would even kiss me ....she also told me that she really hadnt had sex with him she jus said that cus she was mad...so i felt hope still ...it sucked hbeing with her n watchin her leave knowin she was going to him and when she was with him i didnt exist....about a month of this passes n she had sex with me one night... i found out over her textxs again they did have sex...she told me leave n i thought thats the end....the next morning she called me cryin apologizing n i met her she said she broke up with him and felt horrible ...and wanted to be with me ...however she couldnt be with me now because i hurt her so much n she wasnt ready...but i felt that she had hurt me more because i never dumped her n then jus str8 lied about everything n dated someone else...i did take her for granted and lie for my drug use about where i was or who i was with.....so i felt that this was unfair ... we started hangin out a lil more and she wouldnt kiss me anymore which made no sense because when they were together she would act like we were together whn we hung out n when she broke up with him suddenly it stopped...she still hung out with him sometimes n i didnt beleive they were jus friends when i brought it up she freaked out sayin i need to trust her n i didnt understand how i coudl or why she thought i ha a reason to.... so the last 2 weeks from tonight , right now ....me and her have been hanging out everyday all day and everything has been perfect and ive accepted she needs space so i havnt tried kissing her n we have jus been spending time together and i felt like shit was gettin better.....so this past sunday she called me at work sayin she needs someone to watch sthe baby i told her i was stuck at work call my dad ...i called her fater work nher phone was off ..i had no clue what was ging on so i went to her work n she wasnt there...(normally she works until 12 ish) it was only ten....her phone was dead and instantly i had my gut feeling of where she was ....three hours later she calls me i found out ofcourse she called her ex and dropped the baby off there she said she picked her up at 8 and came to my house . i wasnt there so she went back to his house they went out to eat...naturally i grew a lil suspicious but i didnt accuse her n tried trusting her still she got mad and hung up the next day we hung out n it was ok i went to a meetin n she knew i would b back in an hour i told her i was leavin soon n meet me home she said ok i ge home n call she doesnt answr and hour later she textx me saying she went to her ex;s to get our duaghters stroller cus she left it a while ago n was feedin our daughter...i didnt reply thinkin she would b here soon n wouldnt get mad because in the end she came to me...another hour passes n i knew she was stayin there...she said because she knew i would give her shit for seein him n didnt wanna deal with it ..i then explained no i wasnt but now im mad because u ignored my calls n texts....w.e shit was fine the next day...today she came over n we both had clear shcedules and i was so excited she came over i made breakfast an shortly after she went to sleep...i tried waking her to do somethin n she got annoyed and i looked through her phone while she was sleeping because after the las two days of her being with him something didnt feel right.....ofcourse she had sex with him the night she left work early n gave me shit for questioning her.. i didnt say anything jus went outside next thing i kno sheis storming out my house with the baby leaving i didnt let n we fought a lil then calmed down n finished the day together...idk why i wanna give her chances still and i dont know what to make of her...She says in the long run she wants to be with me n she loves me ...and she doesnt even like him n hes annoying ..but then i think how can u say that if u continuously hurt me with him and afeter u broke up with him and have been hanging out wit me everyday telling me u love and miss me ..u cant even kiss me barely and u jus have sex with him so easily...she said she felt like shit about it like last time and it just happened...i dont understand how if she felt horrible the first time she would do it again or why she cant even kiss me or have sex with me when she wants to be with me and its nothing to her with him when it breaks my heart.........so if anyone has any ideas or opinions or anything to help please let me kno....at this pint im thinkin no matter jow hard it is i need to not speak to her and get over her . It was already pushing it when i gave her another chance after the first seriies of lies and her being sorry....but again the same way ..and this time she didnt even say anything about it i didnt either until before she left n now she says leave her alone ....but shes sorry it makes no sense ... what do i do .....GIRLS' any input from you because you understand girls

Whoa there...first off, make a new thread for this. Then, try to condense the information a bit and make some paragraphs, because it's really really hard to read your post in this form.