My peronsal love story... (Part 1)
This is the first half of my own personal love story. It's the story of my first and only love, Elise. It's only half-written but I wanna get some feedback on it before I write the rest. And I don't plan on writing a book... I wrote this as if I were writing in my own personal blog/journal so you'll see I took some liberties with my grammar here and there. Anyways, enjoy... feedback please.
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When I was 14, I worked at the AAFES Commissary on an airforce base up in Massachusets bagging groceries. That's where I met the love of my life, Elise.
It started with us just staring at eachother as we bagged at work, and soon I was walking her home. We never talked about it, but we were both madly in love with eachother. We would sit on the top of the half-pipe at the skatepark alone at night when it was 10 degrees out; we didn't care. We would just hold eachother, shivering until she absolutely had to be home.
Eventually, I worked up the courage and asked her to kiss me. (Keep in mind this was my first real girlfriend... I know, sad right?) She said yes and that night, on the path that lead up to her house, we leaned in to kiss eachother and wouldn't you know it she passes out into the snow. I knew my breath wasn't THAT bad so I assumed it was the cold and held her until she warmed up enough to come to. We were both scared to death. I managed to drop her off at her door and see her inside.
For some reason, and I have no idea why, I couldn't talk to her after that. I assumed that even though she said it was the cold, the problem was me. We ended up going our seperate ways and pretty soon I was going out with the hottest girl in my school. (I was in middle school at the time, Elise was in high school.) She also found a boyfriend in this short little bastard named Dusty. I hated Dusty and he hated me but I never really cared that they were going out.
Four months later, I am without a girlfriend and she is without a boyfriend. Then comes a lock-in at the base Youth Center. We're both there and I couldn't resist being locked in a building for 12 hours without talking to her so I started a little conversation and by the time the sun came up, we were passed out asleep, leaning on eachother. I was in love again.
This time, I decided to take advantage of what I had. We were at her house watching movies and I asked her if she wanted to try that kissing thing again. Without missing a beat, she grabbed my hand and led me upstairs. A minute later, I'm standing in the hallway waiting like a dumbass while she brushes every germ from her teeth. She finally came out and there, in the hallway, we kissed for the very first time. And just my luck! When I realized that our tongues were in eachother's mouths I almost threw up. Was I really doing this? What the hell was my problem? I was gagging and trying my best not to choke. I looked down at my knees and they were shaking. I was so nervous... I couldn't handle kissing her; I was that in love with this girl.
A few days went by and I could finally make out with her without spilling my breakfast. We talked on the phone 'til the early hours of the morning every night and couldn't wait 'til school was out so we could go to work and be with eachother. It was all so perfect. Then, walking home one night, I worked up the courage and got onto the topic of blowjobs. She told me she was willing to give me one and there, in the woods, I got my first BJ. I know 30 seconds is a little short but it was my first time and it didn't help any that the first thing she said was "WOW... It really is big!". Early cummings aside, some time went on and began to realize that this girl was heaven in a box.
Some time in April of that year, me, Elise, one of her brothers, Tom, and Anthony were in Anthony's bedroom. We were joking around, listening to music, and making eachother smell things we found in Anthony's closet. Elise and I somehow ended up in Anthony's bed and were making his sheets sweaty in no time. After about half an hour of making out, the song "Nothing Else Matters" by Metallica came on. Don't ask me why but I was compelled to say the most bold thing I've ever said to anyone ever... I stopped kissing her and when she asked me and got worried when she saw the scared look on my face. I asked her if she would ever leave me. She said no. I paused for about 10 seconds and then managed to squeak out an "I love you". seconds later she was hugging me crying telling me that she felt the same way. Sure, that wans't the most romantic place on earth to propose such feelings but it had to be done.
Just so you know, my mom is/was an alcoholic and for years I had been begging for her to let me go live with my dad in Texas. I had to get away from her. In fact the only good thing about living on that base was Elise! Well a few days after confessing my love to her my wish finally came true. I was going to live with my dad. Elise was... disappointed to say the least. I had mixed feelings but I knew that this move was what was best for me. I had no idea how bad it would screw everything up in the long run. Elise and I spent our last day together holding eachother and kissing under a bridge in the pouring rain. This was also the first time I had ever fingered her... or any girl for that matter. It was more fun that I thought it would be. At 6PM that evening, we said goodbye at her front door and I watched her walk upstairs to her room where she stayed and cried for the next 2 days. Sure I felt bad for her but I also thought it was kind of cool that she'd hurt so bad over me leaving. We hadn't decided if and how we'd carry on our relationship or end it right there. We didn't know what to do.
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This is where the story gets very hard to tell. I'll leave it here for now and maybe pick it up some other time. If you read the whole thing, thanks... peacelove.
