Overthinking an event and ruining our relationship
Hello
I am currently in a relationship with a girl I really like. She is however more in love with me than I am with her, mainly due to me overthinking a situation that happened a few years ago.
We learned to know each other when she initiated contact with me and my friend. I didnt talk to her at all during the evening, or any of her friends. As the night went on she approached my friend but he rejected her. Nothing happened. The next day, when she learned to know me, she felt something and she admitted she had fallen in love with me as soon as she learned to know me. Later on, I became the first person to have sex with her.
Since then, she has been crazy about me. Before we got into this relationship we had known each other for more than 3 years and a few months ago it got serious. She had changed and now I cant imagine myself being without her.
What is bothering me is that I spend all day thinking about if we are meant to be or not. I keep thinking that if my friend didnt reject her they would be together right now and she would be totally crazy about him instead. I keep feeling that I was the 2nd choice and that it was up to my friend whether we would be together or not.
I try to convince myself that theres a reason shes with me and not with him. But then it feels like the only reason for that is because he rejected her!
I am still the only one she has slept with although its gone more than 3 years. She has had other partners during these 3 years, and I dont even care about it. The only thing that is bothering me is this event. Its ruining our relationship and everytime I think about her I get into this negative mood. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I ve been hurt so many times before?
Why I am doing this?
What should I do to be able to open and give her the love she deserves?
Thank you
RTS