So soon after my breakup ?

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14-03-11, 12:57 PM
JadenMia

So soon after my breakup ?

So i have been going through a tough breakup. It has been a nightmare.. Iv been snappy with friends and family.. Crying myself to sleep on a night. Its been awful :(
My friends ended up dragging me out of the house last night to have a good ol' girls night. We ended up meeting up with the whole clan and i had such a wicked time!! Well there was a guy there who we have always kinda had a 'thing'..
Its hard to explain but its like we have a connection and we both know it. I have always been with my ex though so we never acted on it.

Well last night we ended up chatting away having a good time.. and he asked if we could go speak in privacy to discuss something. I agreed and we went to the porch.. He told me he feels something amazing when hes with me.. And he said he knows i feel it too. I do..
He kissed me and we kissed for a good few minutes. It just felt so right..I told him that i didnt want to jump into anything.. but I left with a smile :)

Today he as text me saying he missed me, couldnt wait to see me etc..
It confused me though.. As he text me saying this.. 'I just want to let you know, i wont ever be a douche to you.. I promise. I honestly want to be friends forever'.. Then said 'You probably dont believe me, and think i sound like every other guy.. But u will see'.

What does that mean??? lol He wants to be just friends.. He wants to see how it goes been friends.. lol i dont know..
I dont mind either way. I have liked him for a long time.. But i would be cool being nothing more than friends.. Especially now.
The thought of being with another guy since my breakup repulsed me.. But there is something different about him.. He's an awesome person to be around and always has been!

Also is it a really bad thing that i already like someone else? I know i should be alone at times like these after a breakup.. But today has honestly been the first day iv felt sane and just happy to be here. lol
I know these are dangerous waters to get involved with anyone else.. I am by no means going to rush anything either.. Should i just stay away? Or just go with the flow?

I dont want to mess up my healing process.. But im enjoying myself tbh :)
14-03-11, 08:17 PM
xxazurexx

Well I say good for you that this guy has came into the picture for whom you have a strong interest. Our focus and when this happens, slightly shifts from our ex and onto the new person and he could be the guy to help you get over your ex.

When someone new came into my life, I think me and the previous guy had been split for 5 months and I still wasn't over him. But the new guy...well I guess that gradually and over time and spending time with him, I thought about the ex less and less and then I was completely over him.

I'm thinking it's real early days for you though, you have only split with your ex just over a week/2 weeks?? But still, if you like this new guy I'd take it slow.

I also have to add that I hate it when guys will try to 'convince' me that they are unlike 'other' guys. That they will never hurt me, blah, blah and who expect that I will trust them and immediatley. I think each and every guy that ever came into my life said the same thing....lols
Trust is earned and it isn't earned overnight and I'm suspicious of the ones who protesteth too loudly - because in my experience they have proven to the biggest douches walking. I like the chance and to be able to judge for 'myself' and over time, as to what kind of guy he is. Which is why when they say they will never hurt me, etc, it goes in one ear and out of the other.

Does this guy know you are fresh out of a relationship?
14-03-11, 10:49 PM
JadenMia

Quote:

Originally Posted by xxazurexx [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Well I say good for you that this guy has came into the picture for whom you have a strong interest. Our focus and when this happens, slightly shifts from our ex and onto the new person and he could be the guy to help you get over your ex.

When someone new came into my life, I think me and the previous guy had been split for 5 months and I still wasn't over him. But the new guy...well I guess that gradually and over time and spending time with him, I thought about the ex less and less and then I was completely over him.

I'm thinking it's real early days for you though, you have only split with your ex just over a week/2 weeks?? But still, if you like this new guy I'd take it slow.

I also have to add that I hate it when guys will try to 'convince' me that they are unlike 'other' guys. That they will never hurt me, blah, blah and who expect that I will trust them and immediatley. I think each and every guy that ever came into my life said the same thing....lols
Trust is earned and it isn't earned overnight and I'm suspicious of the ones who protesteth too loudly - because in my experience they have proven to the biggest douches walking. I like the chance and to be able to judge for 'myself' and over time, as to what kind of guy he is. Which is why when they say they will never hurt me, etc, it goes in one ear and out of the other.

Does this guy know you are fresh out of a relationship?

Yah it is super early for me. Like not even 2 weeks.. So that kind of worries me a little, but i will be definitely taking it *very* slow.
He knows that im just out of a relationship too, He knows my ex very well and went to school with him. Doesnt get along with him at all though and thinks hes an idiot.

And yes, i HATE when guys try to convince me that they are good guys.. Like.. Ugh. So annoying, do they actually think that we might believe them? haha
Its not that though.. Its the 'friends forever' part that threw me off? Why did he say 'friends forever'?? lol I just thought it was weird and didnt know what he meant by that..
15-03-11, 05:16 AM
xxazurexx

Quote:

Originally Posted by JadenMia [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Yah it is super early for me. Like not even 2 weeks.. So that kind of worries me a little, but i will be definitely taking it *very* slow.
He knows that im just out of a relationship too, He knows my ex very well and went to school with him. Doesnt get along with him at all though and thinks hes an idiot.

And yes, i HATE when guys try to convince me that they are good guys.. Like.. Ugh. So annoying, do they actually think that we might believe them? haha
Its not that though.. Its the 'friends forever' part that threw me off? Why did he say 'friends forever'?? lol I just thought it was weird and didnt know what he meant by that..

Well there is nothing wrong in starting out as friends I guess and see where it leads. Once or twice I took the friends route with guys I liked and it ended up being more.

Maybe he's saying 'friends' and so as not to scare you off. Some guys are wise and he will probably know that the last thing you may be looking for, is a relationship. So to say 'friends' was a safer bet and until at least he knows where your head is at.
15-03-11, 10:45 AM
JadenMia

Quote:

Originally Posted by xxazurexx [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Well there is nothing wrong in starting out as friends I guess and see where it leads. Once or twice I took the friends route with guys I liked and it ended up being more.

Maybe he's saying 'friends' and so as not to scare you off. Some guys are wise and he will probably know that the last thing you may be looking for, is a relationship. So to say 'friends' was a safer bet and until at least he knows where your head is at.

Yeah true that. I'm not actually sure if there was really anything anymore..Even though it truly felt like there was something, it always does when i see him. Since that conversation about him being a good guy and such he hasnt really mentioned anything about us. So im not too fussed I guess we will just see!

I am just glad this has been getting my mind off my ex. Feels goood! :D
15-03-11, 07:48 PM
xxazurexx

^Yeah, it's nice when the focus shifts to someone else.

Anyway I think you are doing well and are extremely strong in regards to the ex. Many women would have gone running back before now, but you have stuck to your guns - so WELL DONE :)
Shame that more women were not like you.
17-03-11, 03:35 AM
JadenMia

Quote:

Originally Posted by xxazurexx [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

^Yeah, it's nice when the focus shifts to someone else.

Anyway I think you are doing well and are extremely strong in regards to the ex. Many women would have gone running back before now, but you have stuck to your guns - so WELL DONE :)
Shame that more women were not like you.

Yeah its a lot of weight off my mind. Im still finding some things hard n il have my odd breakdown here and there... lol
But im doing good. I would recomend getting out of an abusive relationship to every woman i know thats in one. Its a great feeling and it IS possible to do!!

So thankyou it was a lot to do with the support of this site that helped me. Couldnt thank everyone enough!!!