Idk if it's me the world or women.

So I'm sort of involved with my best friend. She recently had a breakup (2 months ago) and I'm pretty sure things started as me being a rebound I probably am still idk. I would have liked to wait longer by another 2 months atleast but she just asked me if I liked her one day and i kinda went with it. Anyway we've always been really close as best friends usually are. Most of my relationships haven't been super successful and lately with her things started to get a bit dry, so i decided to do something about what I normally do in relationships, generally I often tell the other person how i feel, how much i care about them, and how they make me happy. I figured if i feel that way its probably good to let them know. Well i suppose this behavior comes off as a bit smothering and i kill whatever fire there is. With my best friend things kind of went similar until i noticed it last night. After reading that i should stimulate the emotion part of her brain i decided to try it. Things changed almost immediately. We talked the whole day and it seemed like i did most of it, i asked her for some pics and got no response so about and hr or 2 later I told her i was going to bed (i normally talk with her for several more hrs) so it was abnormal for me. About 2 mins later i get a phone call and a sad face txt i decided to ignore it. Today I woke up with 3 new pics on my phone.

My question is does anyone else think this is crazy? If i would have told her she meant the world to me I can promise she would be less responsive then me ignoring her. Do women actually enjoy this behavior? I feel like i care so much about her and the only way to keep the relationship going is if i put on this facade that i care less. It even makes me feel like i should reevaluate relationships where guys do care less because if this is really how things "work out" maybe the guy who doesn't care so much is like me and he really cares a lot? Honestly i don't want to exhibit this behavior in relationships because to me it feels less then honest. I really don't know what to think of this anymore, the reality of the world seems so different then it should be. Up is down, peace is war, freedom is security, If you care a lot about someone don't show it.

The problem isn't that you care or that you show it. The problem is you are picking emotionally unavailable women on the rebound who are vulnerable, craving attention, nice words and an ego boost and once they get it, they heal from the breakup and move onto someone else.

Why are you friends first with women and wait on the sidelines while they date others? you are pushed into the "nice guy friend type" category when you do that.. We don't want to date someone we already know everything about. Where is the excitement in that?

you need to go straight into dating mode and stay off the friend shelf

Tbh I do kind of prefer to date friends over strangers though this situation is a bit different then that. Typically If I'm looking to date someone I like to be their friend but keep them at a far distance while i learn their qualities and behaviors without knowing those 2 things I find it difficult to pursue someone because of past experiences. This situation is different however because i didn't always like them, in fact when we first met i didn't even want to be their friend. After we developed a legitimate friendship I started to like her. At the time she was dating our mutal friend and i don't like to pursue people in a relationship so i just remained her friend as i still benefited from that. I even looked for other relationships, finding someone who peeked my interest similarly didn't happen by the time she broke up with her bf and asked if i liked her a couple months later. I'm aware of what a rebound means for me I guess I hope I'm more then that or can make it more then that. My past relationships were not rebounds it's actually the first time I've found myself in a situation like this, I plan to ride it out regardless how ever it ends good or bad. Salvaging our friendship remains a possibility. And my real questions remain why is she more responsive when I ignore her then when I'm kind and caring? Why do women respond to emotional roller coasters and delayed gratification?

Maybe you should tell her how you feel. Be assertive. Tell her you feel like shes being hot and cold right now and you don't fancy being taken for a ride and you would like to know where you stand with her

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And I don't really know why she responds more to being ignored. Maybe shes confused about what she wants or afraid of being hurt

Thanks for responding. :)

"The person who cares the least holds the most power."

you need to go straight dating