A Question for the Ladies

A few years back I grew very close with a cousin of mine, a 2nd cousin to be exact. We spent a lot of time talking on the phone, texting, skyping, etc. At the time we were both single. We lived a ways away from each other so hanging out wasnt really an option. When we did hang out we had a lot of fun and she ended up staying the night. Different rooms no issues. Afterwards we kept talking like we had been when she started telling me about her having "dreams" about us dating and what not. It was like us flirting with each other.

Soon afterwards I started to have feelings for her. After mustering the courage I confronted her about the ongoing situation with us and our feelings and we actually discussed dating however she started to get cold feet about the situation saying there was no way we could keep it a secret and so on.

Thus we sort of moved on from the situation, started dating other people and sort of forgot about it. Now years later were both single and have been talking quite a bit again and I still feel the same about her.

My question is how do I go about finding out how she feels or what is a subtle way to find out without having a situation like last time?

Start a conversation with "do you remember when we used to talk about dating?" Her response will tell you whether or not to take it further.

Having said that, if there's still a need to keep it secret, then just don't bother at all.

I wouldn't suggest you date a second cousin.

Yeah, I'm with Joanna on this one. You don't have anybody else you can work on a relationship with? If you and have her kids, there is a possibility they will come out slow. I'm not being funny but that's a fact. I've seen it before.