The Very Last Note

today was the day that I sung my last note
it came to an end with all of my hope
i used to sing songs to help make me happy
to bring on emotion thats not meant to be
some would make me smile, some make me laugh
everywhere i could go, except for my path
but today was different, its hard to explain
but no matter what i heard, all i felt was pain
instead of smiling i would frown
digging my soul deeper in the ground
instead of laughing I would cry
with every waking moment i wished i would die
but alas here i am again writing this now
sometimes i ask myself why and how ?
why am i still alive, how am i still here
I am scared of Death, but its not my worst fear
so alone again i sit and mope
trying to spit out a happy note.

7-29-04

very deep i hope ur not thinking about doing anything bad to urself

i finally have a song again. I've written a guitar part a few months ago that i have been playing over and over again, modifying it little by little, without any words, until tonight. I finally browsed thru some old poems i wrote and i put words to it. And it so happened to be this poem that fit the song that I've written. I dont have any recordings yet, but hopefully, if time permits it, I will post a recording of this song up here in mp3. as for now i will just post up the updated lyrics to this song. I've added two lines to this poem to keep everything even and smooth. ya'll tell me what you think of the lyrics, please.

today was the day that I sung my last note
it came to an end with all of my hope
i used to sing songs to help make me happy
to bring on emotion thats not meant to be
some would make me smile, some make me laugh
everywhere i could go, except for my path
but today was different, its hard to explain
but no matter what i heard, all i felt was pain

instead of smiling i would frown
digging my soul deeper in the ground
instead of laughing I would cry
with every waking moment i wish i would die

but alas here i am again writing this now
sometimes i ask myself why and how ?
why am i still alive, how am i still here
I am scared of Death, but its not my worst fear
I've tasted the knife from the hands of Death
Many times i've died, and again gained new breath
so alone again i sit and mope
trying to spit out a happy note

instead of smiling i would frown
digging my soul deeper in the ground
instead of laughing I would cry
with every waking moment i wish i would die

ok here is me playing the guitar - i havent gotten up the guts to sing while recording yet... i am a bit shy... :(

But since this file is a bit too big to attach i am going to give you a link to the file thats on my server.

[url]http://billy.pl3x.net/verylastnote.mp3[/url]