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Yes! You can win your lover back...no matter how stubborn the resistance, no matter how far this person may be from you, no matter how hopeless, difficult, or different you think your situation appears. I will be giving you tips that will enable you get your lover back.
It seems that most of us women encounter some sort of commitment issue with our partners at one point or another. The guy just doesn't want to see us exclusively, or they don't want to get married any time soon.
It's a frustrating experience for us, but it doesn't have to be. Instead of thinking that this situation is all your fault, you need to realize that there are plenty of things you can do to make your relationship a smooth ride – and eventually allow your relationship to become a long term partnership instead of a fleeting friendship with benefits.
1) Why Doesn't He Want to Be With You?
The first thing we women like to do is to blame ourselves for our commitment troubles. We think we've been too pushy or we've asked too much, and that's what has driven him away. But this isn't usually the case. For many guys, they might simply feel like they're not ready to fully commit to someone else, and to do so is just wrong for them.
They don't want to put you through that. Other guys are afraid of commitment because it hasn’t worked out for them in the past. And still other guys just don't want to settle down yet – and it's nothing personal.
I was once seeing this guy and after six months of going out nearly every weekend, I called him my boyfriend in front of some friends. He became distant and sullen, as though I'd called him something far worse.
It turned out that his definition of commitment was the fact that we were dating, but he didn't like the label because it made him feel like he was trapped. And just for that, we broke up.
But if I'd realized that he wasn't ready for that label, we could have still dated and probably eventually gotten to a more committed point. So, what can you do to help work through the inevitable commitment issue?
2) Giving Him Space
One of the things that women don’t realize is that men need a lot of breathing room. And it's not because they're upset with us or that they don't want to be with us, they just need the space in order to think things through and to feel as though they can do whatever they want to do.
Instead of insisting that your man be home every night to be with you, try to reduce the amount of time you 'need' to spend together. This will help him feel comfortable to hang out with his friends and to explore other hobbies besides you.
In doing so, you are showing him that your life together won't be just sitting together and talking about your feelings. He will be able to go out and do things like he always did before. Knowing this, he's going to be much more likely to stay committed and to want to remain committed to only you.
3) Recognizing When It's Time to End It
Of course, while there are a number of ways you can help your partner feel less claustrophobic in the relationship, some men simply don't want to be committed to one person. And while some women can handle this, I know that from my experience, I can't.
I need to be with a man who can fully commit. So, if a guy doesn't seem like he's ever going to settle down, I let him know what I want and if he doesn't want to be a part of that, we will break up. it sounds a little harsh, I know it, but if you're both looking for two different things, why extend a relationship that obviously isn't working?
4) Are You As Committed as You Want Him to Be?
That said, if you're asking your partner to be committed to you, you need to be willing to remain committed to them as well. Often, women seem to think that the guy is the one that needs to do all the work in a relationship in order to be committed, but you need to hold up your end of the deal too.
Go to things that are important to him and make sure you are helping him feel like your love is committed to only him. In doing so, you will both be working toward a common commitment goal and that's going to help you both get what you want and deserve from the relationship.
Relationships are a two way street, a dance with two partners, and a game where you both need to be on the same side. But when relationships are committed and you're both honest about what you want and what you expect, I can promise that things get a lot easier for the both of you.