Confused at. Halp

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07-07-17, 02:08 AM
Salemx3

Confused at. Halp

So this guy has been perusing me for a good month before I actually agreed to go out. We hung out he told me he was super attracted to me, we made out a little but didn't hook up. I had told him that I'm tired of sleeping with a guy and then him just ghosting me like they typically do nowadays like that's just the MO. Which he said he wouldn't do that because then how would you keep hooking up- yeah he got jokes. So anyway he tells me that he wants to date (idk if he meant me or just letting me know in general that was his intentions) and he eventually wants to get married and have kids one day. I call bullshit but that's just because I don't think they're are any good guys left out there.

He asks me to come over and hang out again- we hook up this time. We didn't really spend much time together because his buddy came over and I felt like a weird third wheel. He walked me to my car and kissed me goodbye and said "it was nice seeing you again". To me and idk if it's because I just assume he's going to lose interest once we have sex but I feel like whenever a guy says that, they have no intention of seeing me again lol.

He didn't text all day the next day but responded to a text I sent- he said he felt ill so he didn't really text as often as I'm used to. He did text this morning but still..idk I feel like something's off. Not sure if it's just me over analyzing every little thing or if I have been had yet again!

I guess I want to know if a guy not texting you the day after you guys do the nasty, does that mean he's not interested? And would it come off as being desperate if I asked him out on a third date?

Thanks for any advice given!

Sincerely,
The over analyst
07-07-17, 02:16 AM
pcmaster

Well I would text the same night girl if we had sex, even after making out for first time I would text girl the same day or night.

Anyway maybe hes just experienced guy and dont give a fck.

I wouldnt sound desperate if you asked for thirt date. Its okay to initate sometimes. It should be 50% vs 50% effort from both of you.

Hope this "halps".
07-07-17, 02:30 AM
Salemx3

Quote:

Originally Posted by pcmaster [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Well I would text the same night girl if we had sex, even after making out for first time I would text girl the same day or night.

Anyway maybe hes just experienced guy and dont give a fck.

I wouldnt sound desperate if you asked for thirt date. Its okay to initate sometimes. It should be 50% vs 50% effort from both of you.

Hope this "halps".

Thank you for the reply! He did text me to drive safe the first night we met. I assumed he would have texted me that the second time as well...but I figured because he had his friend over and they were drinking he just didn't. Automatically though I see that as guy not giving a fck. which goes against like...everything he told me previously. I like to think I'm a good judge of character and he seemed sincere but I guess only time will tell. I just suck at dating lol. I feel like too many people play all these games and theres all these "rules"- I prefer to be direct and upfront. I wish more people were that way as well.
07-07-17, 02:35 AM
pcmaster

Well if he was with a friend then its normal he forgot to text you besides he was drinking.

Rules sucks cause its nerdy to follow rules and every situation is different so its better to go by the feel.
07-07-17, 02:44 AM
Salemx3

Quote:

Originally Posted by pcmaster [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Well if he was with a friend then its normal he forgot to text you besides he was drinking.

Rules sucks cause its nerdy to follow rules and every situation is different so its better to go by the feel.

Lol I don't like the rules either. I'm hoping that he's just texting less cause he was sick and then he's overall pretty busy during the day and can't text at work unless he's on break. So i'm probably just reading too much into things. I do this A LOT.
07-07-17, 03:58 AM
Salemx3

*update*

I asked him if he wanted to be my date to a movie tomorrow night- his response "no. i'm going to see my mom"

[URL=http://www.loveforum.net/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=dead]#dead[/URL]

Like I literally lol'd. He's just like...no..like it's gunna be a hard pass lmao.
07-07-17, 05:31 AM
pcmaster

This word no kills the love. I try to avoid it ussualy. Anyway he could as well indroduce you to his mom.
07-07-17, 12:34 PM
Snow White

Well, this sounds like the type of guy who got what he wanted by saying what he knew you wanted to hear. He pursued you for a month. You gave him the "I don't want to be used for sex" speech and of course he told you he wanted more than that (and the fact that you called bullshit should have been a red flag) and you slept with him on the next date. The fact that he didn't text you the next day should have been a sign. If you were a guy, wouldn't you text to say something nice about what happened? And the fact that you asked him out to the movies and he simply said "no" and did not try to make it another day should open up your eyes and tell you to move on.
11-07-17, 04:56 AM
Salemx3

Quote:

Originally Posted by Snow White [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Well, this sounds like the type of guy who got what he wanted by saying what he knew you wanted to hear. He pursued you for a month. You gave him the "I don't want to be used for sex" speech and of course he told you he wanted more than that (and the fact that you called bullshit should have been a red flag) and you slept with him on the next date. The fact that he didn't text you the next day should have been a sign. If you were a guy, wouldn't you text to say something nice about what happened? And the fact that you asked him out to the movies and he simply said "no" and did not try to make it another day should open up your eyes and tell you to move on.

Thank you for the advice. It took less than 24 hrs after I made this post to stop feeling sorry for myself and realize he was a douche and that I yet again feel for the whole "good guy" routine. If guys were just more straight up about just wanting to have sex I feel like things would be so much easier. I would have totally been down for a FWB situation. Oh whale.

Thanks again for your comment :)