I love her

Hi!
I am in love with a girl in my class, i loved her since the first eye contact we have together. We have the same age, she is few months older than me.
When we know each other in class, i looked her only in her eye and she looked me in the same way. In my contry its hard for a good girl to drink coffe with a boy thats is in class and when she have a few weeks thats she knows him. She is left handed, beautiful, i have her eye all day in my mind, shes nice, she is a good student, learn a lot, dont make a lot of make-up but only her lips. She dreesed cool,and she is a rich girl.
We have speake together in class and i wanted more from here, i wanted to know more about her.
After i understanded thats i was in love with her, i observed her about everything, i searched about her family, her school, and i learned a lot o things and i was sure thats she was the right girl for me. In hight school her grades was A- , in universtity A-. Her parents was divorced when she was 10 years old, i know what buissnes have her mother, how many taxes she dont pay to the state, i know a lot.
One day, i told to her, hey i want thats me and you to go out, drink something, know each other better, i know thats we have an attraction
and why not to go out together. Her answer was just no and she told me that our attraction to stay only just a class friend.
For 2 weeks we havent speak together, but after 2 weeks we speak but somthing, she helped me in a test, she risked her self for me.
Now we speak only as a class friend.
I was sure thats she wanted me and she want me.
her pupil-eye increased every time she see me. Her body langue,her hair, my not funny jokes she laught with my not-funny jokes etc etc.
She is to good and i am not the only thats love her. Are 5 or 6 guys in class that love here.
Each of them in their style, someone ask her about everything, someone in instagram,faebook liked all posts, someone watch her non stop etc.
I just speak to her honestly, i look in eye, thats all.
I am smart,i learn to, i am more better than she in class. I have a scary type. I dont speak to much, i dresed very serious, shave everyday, right handed but left footed :P, i speak only one time, very very serious. I dont play with a girls feelings, i am honest but to many fair. A lot hates me, in class 60% hates me, iknow this fact, and the teachers are afraid from me. I lead the situation every time. Thats me. I cant ask her evey time about something, i dont clicke like her posts, i dont do as others.
I dont know what to do, i am serious because my life was hard, i grew up without father(his dead) i have worked all time, i work more than others.
I have an strong personality but yeasterday i was bad, bad, i was crayz and i was trying to kill my self. Its was the first time thats i wanted to kill my self, i was in roof of a building with 15 floors. I was bad, i dont know. No one know thats i cry in the night, my mother think thats i dont have feelings but i cry all night.
No one knows thats i make poems, they know thats i know only math,math math, only numbers, no one know when i am sick,or hurted.

About her she is a perfct girl, the others guys speak to her,and she answerd to them, i know thats she is a good girl, she never was in relationship with another boy as me with another girl.
I dont know what to do.
I dont know, and this is the first time in my life
Please help me.

You have a crush on her
You have oneitis

She is not the only beautiful rich girl in the world
And she sure is not perfect

I would just assume that she wanted to go out with me
And then ask her
If she says no again
If just be like: oh that’s totally okay. I’m gonna ask you next week again and I will keep asking you until we do go out *name*

I have crush, i know, but she was sick the week before and she didnt come in class, so i wrote to her,and her answer was, thanks i am fine.
I dont know what to do anymore, i know thats she is not perfect but for the moment i am blind, i cant se bad things on her.
She is rich, this is a problem for me, because she spend a lot for clothes. She have travel in all Europe,and USA , i have never travel out of the state.
I dont want her money, i just want her, i am in a big problem with my feelings.
I watch her everynight in my dreams,but dreams are dreams.
If i ask her again, it will be the last time, i am not a dog to follow her.
I dont know.
Thanks for your answer.