I think my fiancé has been cheating on me ever since his mother passed away.
My fiancé and I have been together for a little over six years. About eight months ago his mother passed away due to ovarian cancer. It was very aggressive and by the time we found out it was pretty much too late to do anything.
After she passed we moved from Virginia back to his hometown In North Carolina. We moved back because his dad was taking it pretty hard as expected. Honestly we all just wanted to be together. It was a really tough time.
At his mother’s funeral he reconnected with an ex girlfriend of his. I knew about her and they kind of grew up together. They remained good friends. I knew that. I didn’t mind because she had always been very respectful to me whenever we saw her when we visited.
At first the three of us would hang out and do things together. Just to get out of the house because I knew he was getting depressed sitting around the all day with his dad.
Almost a month after his mom passed his dad had to be admitted to the hospital for a week because he had not been eating right and basically he was dehydrated and malnourished. I kind of became his dad’s home aide. If that’s what you’d call it? Whenever I wasn’t working I was taking care of his dad. So naturally I wasn’t with him a lot. Although he has made it pretty clear to me he doesn’t want to be around me.
For the last five months he’s been acting very strange. I’ll wake up in the middle of the night and he’d be on the phone with his ex girlfriend. He’s always with her. He’ll turn down date nights with me to be with her. He’s even started to stay at her house some nights.
I’ve confronted him about it multiple times and he just gets upset and yells and screams about me being insecure and selfish. I try to keep fights to a minimum because of his dad but at this point I’m over it. I try to tell him what I’m feeling but he just dismisses everything I say and tells me I’m making everything about myself.
I want to be there for him and his dad but if he’s going to do this to me I’ll leave. I picked up my entire life and moved for him just so he could be with his dad during this time and I feel like I’m still sacrificing. I’m giving up my time, my dream career and my happiness to try and support him. I hate to say it that way but I wasn’t even given the chance to grieve. She’s not my mother I get that but she’s been like a mother for almost six years.
It’s beginning to be too much. On top of all of that I truly believe he’s cheating on me and even if he isn’t over these last few months he’s completely destroyed my self esteem. He talks to me any kind of way and he’s constantly criticizing everything I do. He’s always comparing me to his friend.
No one has once checked on me to see how I feel or if I’m ok. I feel like I’m alone sitting in chaos and everyone else is just out doing their own thing. While I’m running around trying to make sure they’re all fine.
TLDR; I don’t want to be selfish and make this tragic situation about me. I can’t imagine what he’s going through but at this point I don’t know whether I want to just pack up and leave or if I want to work this out.
