I love her and I hate her

Hey guys. I added the other day the post about me and my girlfriend and how the communication between us is poor and I gave a lot of example On how she replies to me and how she puts others before me. In this post I want to talk about more on how our relationship is and what is really bothering me in more details, I’ll be honest with you I adore this girl sometimes I envy her personality she got so much love and so many qualities a girl can have. for instance, She is a very confident person she is very smart and she can have a very nice conversation with everyone she meets whether they are alike or not, and everyone that meets her always have this same feelings and feedback towards her, they all look up to her, admire your treats and your confidence and some people get intimidated by her . She is also not very emotional And she puts herself in priority, no I know every strong woman knows that and this is a very positive street but it can also cause problems as well.
For example I can feel that when we talk her emotional pain gets filled faster, and once it does she becomes not very interested in us and starts to prior to rise your own activities. So what ends up happening is I am left not fulfilled in our conversations or situations when she is very happy.
One thing to note is that she is very close to her mum, every major decision has to be approved by her mum whether we go on a trip together or do anything, if her mom doesnt approve, most of the time we end up not going out... I think that is where most of her confidence comes from, her mum loves her so much, but at the same time she is suffocating her from loving others, she gets jealous from me sometimes. My girlfriend is getting all the love and affection from her mum, she lives with her, while I am living abroad (we’re in a distant relationship), and I have more alone time which makes me more needy and overthink.
I’ve had many girlfriends before, i’ve never had this issue. It’s so hard to explain everything that is happening in one post, too much stuff going on in my head, i love her soo much but i am most of the time not pleased, you can compare my situation to an unfinished sex pleasure! It’s like I constantly have blue balls xD
Oh and in terms of sexual intercourse, we do not have sex, she is against it before marriage and i totally respect that, but even for normal pleasuring her appetite is way smaller than mine, i know boys usually have more appetite than girls but the gap is huge! Lol, i was always the one that had less appetite in the previous relationship, but this is a different story! Just to give you a clue, it’s been 3 month that i do not see her, and when i come down for Christmas for 32 days, we spooned 3 times only! Note that we are a new couple (only 2 years) and the first time we did it was after a week of coming down.

Let me know your thoughts, I love her to death but I hate how I am treated, she loves me a lot too but i keep telling her i dont feel it as much, she is so keen of us spending our whole life together, and she want it sooner than I. But me, i want to fix the issues i have first before going any step further

Oh boy? You don’t even have sex and you are perfectly fine with that?

Liar

Yea it doesn't bother me much, she has her values and I respect them, I won't mind normal pleasure with no sex, but that is almost missing too:p

I would suggest a few things

Get in touch with your own needs and emotions
Communicate clearly openly and above all truthful
Communicate in a way that is as caring and nonagressive as possible.
This especially includes communication with your self or your thoughts.

You shouldn’t hate on her for not wanting to have sex or do something that doesn’t feel right, that’s a reflection of things you should deal with, you’re own issues. I’d say leave her be if that’s how you feel. Do you brother and let her deal with her issues. She’s doing the right thing there in not forcing things like sex and stuff when they don’t feel right. I’d actually trust her on that one and do you. Things could be worse, you could be with someone who doesn’t have appropriate morals in place. but she’s doing the right thing by the sounds of things. Obviously we don’t know your whole story and cant get both sides, but usually it’s a good thing to hen someone pulls back during issues

[MENTION=85121]Hooo![/MENTION] I told her the above more than once, she agrees with me and promises to be more available etc.. but nothing happens. And I don't like to keep telling her and complain, it makes the relationship tenser and it gets us no where.

I love her way more than she does, actions show it, I changed a lot of my behaviors to make her happy, I don't sleep before saying good night or wake up before saying gm.
my gifts are surprises are crazy good and worked super hard on, hers are less.
cz i send her a msg filled with love and pics, she reads and doesnt reply or reply 2 hours later, we promised to watch a movie together at that night, she preferred watching a basketball game and taking the time to do her stuff when i am waiting.
she watches a movie we bought that we started together but didn't finish cz it got late and said we'll continue another day, instead she continued it alone without waiting for me.

she doesn't comfort me if i am sad or upset, if she does its something with very little effort and she doesn't check up if i got better. she really isn't empathetic when it comes to my feelings.
she cries and tells my sisters how much she misses me when all day she doesnt reply to her phone.
shes online all day and chooses to talk to everyone in the office and work before replying to me.
but she is keen on having a future together and loves me so much ( in what she says, her actions not so much)
she doesnt put me as a priority, i do.
she comes to Paris for a week, i come to Paris the day, she prepared a box full of gifts and a picnic for us to have in the garden, but she gets a headache, sleeps without an alarm wakes up at night, decides not to come anymore and go have dinner with her bro, and later gives me the box without having the surprise picnic. Note that we haven't seen each other for 2 month before that day, I would've done anything to see her that day and didn't feel she had the same feeling.

That's why i started to love her less, cz she didn't love me back as much as i did, not because of something she did or her persona..

i rememebered all these now cz its been couple of weeks we are barely talking and calling each other, which for her feels normal but for me not that much.

I would suggest you to be more open to her.
Tell her what are your thoughts, be straight and bold.
Take charge of your relationship, dont just sit around.
Though i am not an expert but thats what I feel.
You can ask some experts who are hosting an AMA event. https://loveama.com
It might help.

Then either deal with it
Or leave

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Hooo! [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Then either deal with it
Or leave

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I am with you