Relationship Losing Its Flavor
Hello Love Forum Readers.
I am a very faithful middle-aged Australian male of Italian heritage that finally found the love of his life after many, many broken hearted relationships.
The last 3 years have been nothing but bliss; A dream come true for both my other half & i.
Our love would flow deep and our passion was endless.
Late last year, we decided that the both of us under the one roof was getting a bit too close for comfort ( regardless of the fact that i own a 3 story home in the upmarket suburbs of a major city !) and we needed breathing space in order to breath the same air of love once again.
This new arrangement was working well; We would have our free time to think things thru: And our 'date nights' to rekindle the sparks of days gone by.
It was paradise!
And, truth be told fellow forum readers, this was the FIRST relationship since my primary school days of the early 70's where i DID not stray or be tempted to stray ! ( i was quite the Latin Lover in my day ! )
Then, as her visits were becoming less and less on schedule, and more and more on warpath - She would find ANY excuse to attack me and question me and be suspicious of me !
What gave me away, she claims, was a single packet of old ( probably stale ) chewing gum...with only 2 of the 7 pellets in tact !
It was a peppermint flavor that somehow tipped off my wannabe- Columbo/ Kojak lover to accuse me of having a love affair - with chewing gum !
Now, to be brutally honest, i never turned my back on a Hubba Bubba or Juicy Fruit in the day, yet to assume that i await for her to leave my postcode, and then enter a series of weird and depraved sex acts with a tasty delicious piece of chewy is absurd !
She accused me of blowing a bubble, then covering my impressive erection with the bubble and popping it as i orgasmed !
Then, putting the chewy back in my mouth " to try hide the evidence"!!
Absurd,..I mean if i ever even did that, it was probably on a dare or cos i was watching a late night SBS movie and a tit popped out of a breast feeding momma..i mean who wouldnt jerk off with a chewy to that !! The nipple is same colour as Raspberry Extra !! ( 15 pack )
I used to make her laugh....I would say...
"you know what i am thinking ?,,,and she would say "no, what?',,,And i would give her a clue // " well, what goes in long hard n tasty,,,and cums out soft slimy n smelly ",,,and she would " your cock from my pussy ,,,and we would make out...Now the answer to the question " what goes in long hard n tasty, and comes out small, soft and smelly?,,,is... " A chewy that has been in your mouth for hours while you get high uluru ! :(
I am scared to walk around supermarkets in case i see the chewing gum aisle and i pre-cum in my patandies....
The other night, i talked her out of this ridiculous idea of hers....nearly..until i put my feet up on office desk and she saw a blob of PK stuck to my slippers.
BUSTED !
Help me fellow lovers..of bubbles with no troubles....
:(
I have been called choo-choo all my life cos i like to smoke like a train...Now my gal thinks i am changing it to chew-chew :(
Bob
