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Some people hurt me
I'm 43. I have had every man I've ever been with drop me and rebound to another woman and marry her barely a year later. Many of those ended in divorce, but that has nothing to do with me.
I had them tell me upon dropping me "I'm going to get another girlfriend". Not that that didn't hurt enough, but they said to me "I can attract someone as wonderful as you, I know the next one will be even better!". I had men tell me they have the advantage not me, that I'm an old maid, and I'm pathetic that I'm 43 and still single. How people can be so cruel is beyond me, but this is why I don't date anymore. The last time I reached out to someone I had a crush on he rejected me and said he wasn't interested in me romantically. I never spoke a word to him again, I have some dignity. I'm broken in a million pieces, I cry because no one wants me. I bumped into someone not long after one person in question dumped me and he said "Really? He left you? He really missed out, you're a classy woman." I don't know what to say. The world is full of 7.5 billion people and NONE of them want me? It feels like it.
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Oh honey. I am sorry the world feels so isolating. FWIW, I was 39 when I met my husband & 41 when we married so I understand how awful the old maid cracks feel.
What are you doing to self soothe? There were a few things I did that helped me feel better about myself which lead to a more balanced loving place in my head which lead to my husband.
1. I got a dog. All that unconditional love was very therapeutic.
2. I built a nest. I have a great fireplace. On cold winter nights, especially weekends when I was alone & unwilling to venture out, I'd build a fire, put on a lifetime / hallmark sappy movie, have a glass of wine & snuggle under some throw blankets on my couch.
3. I traveled, spent time with friends & volunteered. The volunteer stuff kept me quite busy. I was out almost every night of the week, doing some good for humanity, so I didn't have time to wallow in my single state.