take things slow...what does that mean?

alright...i need some advice...

i'm interested in this girl. we have been friends for several months. i was CONVINCED that she had no interest in me as anything more than a friend for several reasons. but i still crushed on her secretly (although i'm sure she realized it by my actions).

now...we went on a little trip with a bunch of friends this past weekend. seven of us were staying in one hotel room. it ended up that we were in the same bed together, next to eachother. didn't think anything of it. well...she started snuggling up to me...and very gently caressed me throughout the night...nothing dirty, just very sweetly. i was compelled to do the same in return. nothing more happened...

we went out again tonight...just to hang out...we went for a walk and during the walk she takes my arm and we're like that the whole night. so later that night, i take her home. in one of our conversations that night, i asked her about a guy i thought she was interested in and she said she wasn't interested and that they were just platonic. before leaving her, i asked her very bluntly, "are we just platonic?"

she answers..."i don't know what we are. i just wanna take things slowly and see where things lead."

i've only been in clear cut relationships before...what does this mean? what should i expect? i'm confused...

any advice or words of wisdom?

thanks!

It means you can't expect anything because she wants to see where things lead.

Make a move.

Don't make a move.

Don't listen to TAVS; make a move.

Don't listen to a Steelers fan, they lost their Monday Night game....no surprise.

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Originally Posted by TAVS

Don't listen to a Steelers fan, they lost their Monday Night game....no surprise.

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Ouch. :(
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It means go with the flow, man.

You wanna be with her? Step it up. Turn up the heat. Flirt more, make more eye contact, smile more. Only if you're good at this kind of stuff though. You have to know how to read her body language and how to play off that.

Don't bring up "are we platonic?" or anything at all like that again, until the time is right. As in if the flirting is stepped way up and you got that feelin, you guys are feelin that connection, and you're pretty sure she wants to be with you - then you can stay something.

I am getting a good vibe from her.

Go with it, ask her out on a date or two.

Women often do this, "I don't know what we are, I just want to take it slow"

It can be just that, OR, it is a nice jab to get you motivated into action.

Take Action.

Gotta say...I'm terrified to make the first move. The last two guys that tried to make a move on her, she doesn't even talk to them anymore. They were dropped so fast and so callously, it'd make your head spin. I'm hoping when she's readly, it'll be easy for me to recognize.

As for asking her out on dates...we both feel we've already sorta been dating or courting eachother.

I'm sorta confused...I wish I wasn't so incompetent or that people were easier to figure out...

That's why we say "Go with the flow" and see what happens. By "take action" we don't mean get down on one knee or anything like that. Just means to make it known to her you like her more than a friend not by necessarily telling her this, but by flirting more and with your body language, etc etc more words that I've already typed in this thread.

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Originally Posted by Tone

That's why we say "Go with the flow" and see what happens. By "take action" we don't mean get down on one knee or anything like that. Just means to make it known to her you like her more than a friend not by necessarily telling her this, but by flirting more and with your body language, etc etc more words that I've already typed in this thread.

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Gotcha! I can do that! Thanks!

Just PIITP.

PS- I think your screen name is funny.

someone said something along the lines that she said that to "motivate you into action"

I agree.

Just slowly turn up the heat a tiny bit each time you see her. Don't let things get into too comfortable a groove, or you will probably end up in friend territory. And for god's sake no blunt questions like that! If she's wavering you could easliy push her in the wrong direction just by irritating her. She'll let you know if you are pushing too fast, either with words or body language. Anyway that's my .02