Sigh

I've been with a guy almost 10 months. A few months back he moved away for his job. I'm not allowed to hang out with guys. Even in a group situation where my girlfriends are there. After I was told I couldn't hang out with guys..I hung out with them anyways. And my friend kissed me. But we ended it at that considering we were both in a relationship. I don't know how I could break up with him. I love him..but I am not in love with him anymore. I get annoyed when he says things....I don't really want to talk to him...I lie a lot....I need to end it. I'm not sure how. I'm worried he'll do something crazy. He's obsessed with me. Too controlling. And he really has no friends. I was supposed to move where he is but I dont want to go. I have dug myself into a giant hole. I know if I stay with him I won't be happy at all. But anyone who has had to break up with someone knows how hard it is. We even were planning on marriage. *sigh* I just don't know what to do...

Firstly, I can very well relate as I just got out of a similar situation. He doesn't have any friends because he depends on you. Does it not make sense?

He has no friends, he doesn't need them. He has you. He is controlling of you because you are a part of him, which is extremely unhealthy. You aren't allowed to hang out with guys because that leads to a risk of you (being a part of him) tearing off and him losing you. He is extremely dependent of you, which is dangerous.

Leave him because it gets any worse, or you'll regret it. Explain to him and if he doesn't understand, too bad.

Also, you're lying to him! That's a bad thing! Since when is lying a respectable action filled with integrity?

Gotta put your foot down sometime...

Quote:

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Originally Posted by LTsK8eR2gO

Firstly, I can very well relate as I just got out of a similar situation. He doesn't have any friends because he depends on you. Does it not make sense?

He has no friends, he doesn't need them. He has you. He is controlling of you because you are a part of him, which is extremely unhealthy. You aren't allowed to hang out with guys because that leads to a risk of you (being a part of him) tearing off and him losing you. He is extremely dependent of you, which is dangerous.

Leave him because it gets any worse, or you'll regret it. Explain to him and if he doesn't understand, too bad.

Also, you're lying to him! That's a bad thing! Since when is lying a respectable action filled with integrity?

Gotta put your foot down sometime...

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you are right. thank you so much

It sounds liek a seriously unhealthy relationship, and you really need to end it.

There is no point in staying with him cuz ur worried breaking up will make him crazy, or he'll be lonely, or cuz of how you were in the past. Point is your just not in love with him anymore.

Thsi is about you, and this relationship is not healthy for you, and you need to get out now!!!

Plus when you do it, make sure he knows it's final, don't give him any hope at all!!!

He lives out of town..and he is back for a few days. I tried to do it..and then he started saying how he would do anything for me and he loves me so much and I'm more important to him than anything else. We had this discussion about how if my friend was stranded on the side of the road I would go get them even if he was with me and if his friend called he would tell him to call someone else. He said he should be more important than my friends. And we got a dog when i visited him and he said he doesn't even like the dog and he said if I wanted him to move here and quit his job he would do it b/c he just wants to make me happy. And I dont know what to say to that. I can't bring myself to do it. I really need to I know but how?

well he has gone back. theres more to the big story of it all...but now i really want to break up with him and i dont know how i can do it...in two months he is expecting me to move in with him..i dont want to move there..i want to be free..drive and live randomly for a year..that's what i want to do..

Tell him you've stopped shaving your legs and armpits and you've joined a commune for women.

In two months? You have less than two months to tell him, and you better do it fast!

tell him what you told us in that first post ^^ you love him but your not in love anymore its gonna hurt him yeah but guess what if your not happy then its not worth it. dont sacrifice your life for someone who is so jealous etc and untrusting

You don't sound to me like you really care about him any more. He's just a big drag to you.

He doesn't trust you around guys because you kiss them.

I don't understand the question here. You know you have to break up with him. Is it a question of how? Be straight up for once and do it with dignity.

You sound like a really bad girlfriend to me. Are you really, really young or something? Let him go and get on with his life, already.