Is Karma real, is an act of God real?

I've been seeing this really wonderful girl for well over a year now and it has been quite a problem for my parents seeing that they don't like her 1 bit. Granted, her family isn't well off, has a lot of internal issues, but she herself is a great girl that I could not imagine being without....

but over the past week or so, my grandma has jumped into the fray by trying to get me to start dating my long time friend who is going to dental school, has a family with two dental offices, and a very clear and bright future ahead, in contrast to my gf, who is in a constant struggle.

Just last night my grandma was telling me how I needed to find someone who I don't have to take care of and who has a good family such that I don't need to take care of her family. And just in that evening, my gf got into a hit and run, in which she was the victim. I've had to take care of 3 accidents this past year, all three not her fault. It went back to what my grandma said about maintenance. And then came the phone call from my gf in which she said the exact thing that she wanted me to have a good life without the troubles she faces.... but i refused! I promised her that today we would go out, for the first time in a looong time but this morning was rough. I told my gf to go to school w/ her sister this morning so she doesn't have her car. I was supposed to pick her up, but here i am, with my grandma in the hospital from a heart beat irregularity and I can't help but wonder what happened. With so much vehement disbelief and anger from my parents about my choice in girls, and then my grandma's advice, did it take an act of god to stop me from going out w/ my gf today?

what is going on? why is is that good people suffer this way and why is it that as much as i try, i can never do much good for her?

because life is a b!tch and no matter how nice you are it always screws you over , so i say try to screw itself and not give a ****.

"Karma" is bullshit.

But I think its just common sense to know that if you **** with people it will probably come back to bite you in the ass once you've ****ed the wrong person.

I was reading a book by Sylvia Browne. She says that we pick everything that happens to us during our lives...the good and the bad...the big things..the little things..so basically you choose all this to happen..i dont know if it's true or not..but it's very interesting.

i don't know what to tell you about your situation..other than the cliche follow your heart.

It's all Bull shiet.

God? I am god. :]

I really don't understand it.... she carpools w/ her sister in law to work on alternating weeks and on days where her sister is supposed to drive, my gf drives to her place to pick her up so she can have more sleep instead of her sister driving to my gf's place.... and because she parks at her sister in law's house, her car gets hit n run'd. And after all that, her sister and brother in law blame her for parking there..... i don't understand it. there is something seriously wrong w/ that kind of family behavior. my gf tries so hard to handle things for everyone but no one ever gives a damn about what she thinks or does. During her moms bday, she buys food, cake, and all the stuff for everyone before she goes to work and then everyone else celebrates without even calling her to go home early to celebrate. and even worse, no one even saves a scrap of food for her. and this is for a small party for just her immediate family. what the hell is this?

Life can be really unfair sometimes. I don't blame your family I guess they really want the best for you. "Karma" is only karma if you look at it that way. Your gf is going through a rough time then again who doesn't have bad times. If you love her stick by her, the only "signs" come from your heart. I personally feel that "signs from god" and "fate" are things we use to explain behavious we have no explanation for. So the only reason you shoudl not be with her, is because you won't be happy, otherwise screw what everyone else has to say.

I'm feeling awefully horrible at the moment. In the past couple of weeks, my parents have been unknowingly adding more pressure to my life and it's extremely difficult to control the stress. They went on about how my cousin was disgracing the hell out of his family and how they were so glad that I was "such a good boy." The guilt in the past two years has been mounting heavily and I can do nothing but feel the pain. But I snapped two nights ago and was feeling so guilty about dating my gf behind their backs that I was getting sick and suffering from insomnia. I decided to end the relationship and it was just about then that I began feeling a pain that I have long assumed I would never feel again.

She was clearly stunned and upset. She spent all night from 2AM to 7AM trying to pull me back but I could not. As much as she cried, I could not feel the warmth of love any longer. And now that I have more or less made the split permanent, I can't help but feel like I have done something horrible. The day we broke up, she had gone shopping to get me a tie and some miscellaneous things for a wedding we were supposed to be going to. I feel bad that I no longer can be around her family, which I have become so close to.

Granted, we had our problems and never had a completely smooth relationship. But these issues were never enough to make me want to breakup w/ her. I feel terrible in that in this breakup, I break so many promises I had made to her - that i would be there forever, that i would support her, that i would be there to help her sisters when they needed help. I feel terrible that I gave into these feelings of guilt because of my family. I feel that I have lost my stance, my stance that I would be stronger than tradition and culture, and my parents.

In her last email, she promised me she would reach her goal, become a dentist, and find me when she has her success. She told me that she knew I was my "evil twin" and that she would find the real me. She warned "me" not to do anything to hurt the "good twin" and that in the end, everything would be ok.

I can't stop but feel alone.... the quiet in my room is deafening. Considering we would always talk each other to sleep over the phone, not having my phone on is painful to say the least. I need her warmth, I need her embrace, but I find myself unsure of where to fit the demands of my family in between. The guilt is utterly too painful. Do I let down my folks for my own happiness or do I crush her heart to satisfy my own needs to erase guilt?

I want so badly to be at least a friend to her but in my state of mind, I cannot bear the pain. I know if I saw her at this very moment, I would break down crying, pulling her back with ever ounce of my soul.

ho i'm so sorry to hear that, i see you love this girl more than anything, and i also see that you are ready to do anything to make her happy, she must be very happy to find someone like you in her life.
one question though you seem to me ready to do anything not only for her but for her sisters or family??will she do the smae for your family too and for you of course!!!
the other question that just came to e, what will your relation will be if she didn't have all these problems, (do you need a girl that needs you , and need your help, do you like to be the hero and the one always being the nice guy)
just try to think about it forget pain and heart now and use brain for a little bit
and you'll find your answer

Your family seems to want to control your life... If you let them do, you'll regret it later. Live your life the way to avoid regrets and every decision you make, bne sure to remember your reasons.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by satinsad

Your family seems to want to control your life... If you let them do, you'll regret it later. Live your life the way to avoid regrets and every decision you make, bne sure to remember your reasons.

---

it's really weird - that dynamic. I see and understand a lot of sentiment of living the life the way we want it to be but I have to admit that ever since I was young, I have always wanted to live the way my parents raised me. I've always whole-heartedly believed everything they taught me and when it came to my gf, it just became too painful. So when it comes to living the life I want to live, I want to live one based on my parents' teachings, though at the same time, I can't help but feel like a part of me is missing now...

i believe you are in a situation where you nee to choose wether her with all the problems and stuff, or the life you always thought about. you have to make a decision.
i have a question : do you have the pain in your heart because you know she depends on you in a way, or because you love her? in a breaking someone's heart is always a painfull thing, you will feel pain for sometime, and then move on. it's very normal.

It's really tough. I know that we never had a 100% smooth relationship because there seemed to always be some excess baggage on us with regard to people saying she's using me or people saying I'm using her. And in the end, there is also the issue of my own guilt I feel from my family. And it makes me wonder what I may have done unconsciously because of that feeling of guilt. Did I purposely continue fueling arguments w/ her because of that guilt? Had I not felt guilty, how much better off could we be?

Though I have to say.... today I went and handled several business deals, wheeled and dealed on the phone, scheduling appointments here and there, and it felt great. But when I came home, I found my empty room to be quite cold and lonely (I threw out the computer that I used to use to talk to her online w/ during the evenings). My room is clean, too clean.

But in the least, I'm glad that she did not crash completely. We have each other's email passwords and I was checking to see if she had emailed herself her most recent essay to work on and she has. So I don't feel so bad about that at least. But yes, I wonder if how I feel is mostly from the fact that I ditched her at a time when she needs me most or if it is because i really miss the attention and the fact that she always took great care of me.

I don't believe in god any more after all the crap i've been rejected from this year. All of my dreams that i ever had in my life. Gone. Girl (obsessed with for like 5 months), First choice colleges (my dream. worked my ass off for 10 months straight to pull together a kickass resume, and in the end, rejected from all of my first choices), auditions for my prom's MC position (i thought it would be my only redemption for all my other rejections. ended up getting rejected too)

I don't believe in dreams and god anymore. If He really existed, why would all my hardwork have gone to waste?