does he deserve a chance?

we have a strong distant relationship, for 4 years. He decided to go on a trip for 7 months, during his trip he suggest not to take the relatioship too seriously. He never has gf nothing until 23 years old, we falled in love, he came to my country every year, i went to his country. Now he said that he didn't want to take the relationship seriously because he wanted to feel free, because he thought he doesn't have confidence himself and try if he could be with other girls. He didn't tell me if he was neither if he wasn't. I was loyal for 4 years until now. Now he is finishing his trip, and told me he is so surely about me, that i'm the only one, that i don't have to think about the past, just start to live together, that he is going to give his live for me, but i can't stop to think that he was with other girls, i tried to break up with him, he didn't wanted. and i love him. But i don't feel very well with this idea to star to live together if he was with other girls, Does he deserve a chance? If i go to live with him i have to leave my family, i know it is part of the live, but he isn't doing anything for me, just to bring to me to his country, I wanted to ask him to renounce his trip for 15 days, it's ok? or im bad?

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Originally Posted by Fabiana [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

we have a strong distant relationship, for 4 years. He decided to go on a trip for 7 months, during his trip he suggest not to take the relatioship too seriously. He never has gf nothing until 23 years old, we falled in love, he came to my country every year, i went to his country. Now he said that he didn't want to take the relationship seriously because he wanted to feel free, because he thought he doesn't have confidence himself and try if he could be with other girls. He didn't tell me if he was neither if he wasn't. I was loyal for 4 years until now. Now he is finishing his trip, and told me he is so surely about me, that i'm the only one, that i don't have to think about the past, just start to live together, that he is going to give his live for me, but i can't stop to think that he was with other girls, i tried to break up with him, he didn't wanted. and i love him. But i don't feel very well with this idea to star to live together if he was with other girls, Does he deserve a chance? If i go to live with him i have to leave my family, i know it is part of the live, but he isn't doing anything for me, just to bring to me to his country, I wanted to ask him to renounce his trip for 15 days, it's ok? or im bad?

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Hallo Fabiana :)

Your boyfriend wanted to date other women, and while he was on the trip it sounds like he tried to hint it to you. He wanted to fool with girls and have some fun.

He should've been up front with you and perhaps ended the relationship. He may have tried to date other women, but in the end, decided you were his true love.

Whether or not you love him, you need to be able to trust him to have a life-long relationship. Follow your instincts and your heart. Make your decision based off that.

Tell him he needs to earn his way back to the point where you would consider living with him. You have been broken up for 7 months (if I understood you correctly), and now your trust has been broken. He needs to work to re-establish it. (Assuming you want him back, that is.)

thank you for the comprehention

yes! he didn't want to broke up, he was like keep an engagement during his trip, trying no to lose to me. But i didn't feel very well with this weird situation. He is finishing his trip in a month, he told to get married when he finish his trip, and he is sure that he is going to arrage all the feelings i lost, he said is going to give all that i want, he talks about the future, iam really sad about the present. im 50% to leave him and 50% to be with him

Then tell him you need more time to determine whether or not this relationship is a keeper because he broke your trust.

Which thread are you posting in?? This is the second one on this topic.

Sounds like he wanted you to remain faithful while he was free to fool around. This is called bullshit.

Vashti's right- he needs to earn it.

Tell him he has to start back at the beginning with you.

don't be so easy on him!
make him prove his love to you before making up your mind