I Feel Like His Buddies, Football, & Computer Games Are More Important Than Me
I've been with my boyfriend for about 5 months now and things started off great. I never felt so strongly about someone in such a long time and I really felt like I was done searching for "the one." He told me he felt the same way too. We were practically inseparable. Things started to change a few months into our relationship, however.
He slowly started hanging out with his buddies more and more and, although I was almost always invited, it usually involved watching racing or football or BS-ing with the guys. I endured about as much racing and football as I could stand because I wanted to be open-minded and try to like the same things he did, but I don't.
Now, he has 1 night each week completely devoted to playing an RPG computer game online with his buddies from about 6 pm to as late as 2 or 3 in the morning. He goes straight from work into playing that game. And that's okay with me, honestly. I think it's good for people to have a day with just their friends. Besides, it's on a weeknight and, with my boyfriend working 10 hour days, we don't really get to spend much time together during the week anyway.
It's the weekends that I'm hurt over. Ever since football season started, he spends EVERY Sunday at a buddy's place. I don't mind him going over there a Sunday here or there. At this point, I'd even be okay with trading off Sundays. But it's EVERY Sunday. I've told him how important spending weekends together are to me, but he just doesn't seem to get it. I'm LUCKY if he only watches one game on a Sunday.
What's worse is, whenever we do plan time together, one of his friends always seems to call and either ask him to help him with something, or want to hang out with him. And our plans get interrupted EVERY time because my boyfriend won't say no to them.
I'm not a controlling girlfriend, and I'm not a demanding girlfriend. We live together and I do all the grocery shopping, cooking, and cleaning. I don't ask him to do any of that. All I've been asking, practically begging, him to do is be considerate of our time together and my feelings.
I've tried to talk to him about it so many times. I've even tried emailing him, to see if reading my thoughts and feelings would work better. All he does is say, "we'll talk about it later," but instead of talking about it when I want to, we always talk about it when it's convenient for him (i.e. NOT a football day, NOT a computer game night).
We rarely hang out with my friends and it seems like, whenever we make plans to, something comes up or he tries to get out of it somehow. Just last weekend, we made plans to hang out with a couple of my friends (who also consider him to be their friend btw), and he leaves for 2 hours to go watch his buddy's band play. He didn't ask me if that would hurt my feelings or bother our friends, he just said he was going to do it. So, I decide I'm going to make my own plans to get my mind off of feeling so hurt and just to hang out with my own friends, and then he gets jealous.
I just don't know what to do. I hate being constantly disappointed because I think we're going to spend some quality time together and he runs "later than expected," or something comes up last minute. I feel hurt, abandoned, and not considered so often. I love him. I don't want to break up, but I don't know how to get through to him.
