Advise please!

Hi

Well my fiance's best mate/best man who we are pretty close with has been with his girlfriend for about 3 1/2 years and so iv become pretty good friends with her over that time, anyway the mate has been cheating on her lately and my fiance told me about it but "im not meant to know" i feel really really bad and guilty that i know when i see her, what do i do? stay quiet for the sake of my fiance and his best mate? or tell her? i know if i was her i would want to know.
i feel so guilty, but i know that the mate isnt happy in his relationship either. duz any1 have any advise?

I don't know what I would do. I have never been in that situation. I would probably give hints and tell her to keep her eyes open because you suspect something. It's up to you. Some people just stay out of the business.

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Originally Posted by mandy27 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Hi

Well my fiance's best mate/best man who we are pretty close with has been with his girlfriend for about 3 1/2 years and so iv become pretty good friends with her over that time, anyway the mate has been cheating on her lately and my fiance told me about it but "im not meant to know" i feel really really bad and guilty that i know when i see her, what do i do? stay quiet for the sake of my fiance and his best mate? or tell her? i know if i was her i would want to know.
i feel so guilty, but i know that the mate isnt happy in his relationship either. duz any1 have any advise?

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I wouldn't do a thing. Let nature takes its course. Keep your nose out would be my advice

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Originally Posted by Toby [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I wouldn't do a thing. Let nature takes its course. Keep your nose out would be my advice

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Don't listen to Toby. He's a cheater himself... married and ****ing another woman.

OP, the problem that you have in this situation is that if you tell her, your fiance will get it from his best friend. If I were you, I'd try to set it up to where she caught him so neither you or your fiance could be shown as having told on him. If it were me, I'd want to know.

Also, I don't understand why so many people stay in relationships they don't want to be in only to cheat... if he isn't happy, why doesn't he leave?

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Originally Posted by Cain [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Also, I don't understand why so many people stay in relationships they don't want to be in only to cheat... if he isn't happy, why doesn't he leave?

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I never understood this either. You don't have to make the other person feel like crap just because you're unhappy. It's so selfish.

This girl needs to find out somehow, but obviously you can't tell her outright. Like Cain said, you need to somehow set it up so he gets caught and she finds out on her own.

I think it was unfair of your bf to tell you something like that, and then expect you not to want to tell her.

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Originally Posted by bluesummer [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I think it was unfair of your bf to tell you something like that, and then expect you not to want to tell her.

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Especially because she is a good friend of hers.

OP: if you wd like to spill the beans, which I 'd have done myself as i hate others or myself being misled or cheated/lied upon in any situation, just be ready to lose ur relation with ur friend. She might feel bad and stay away from all of you. Seeing u will remind her of such a cheat while u have not helped in that at all.. but it might go this way.

yea, thanks guys, i think "she will find out herself" :P

What are you fiance's views on this cheating? Does he justify it? If not has he raised his opposition to his friend? Just out of curiousity.

I think it's a good sign that your fiance told you this, it means the level of trust in your relationship is good.

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Originally Posted by Mishanya [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

What are you fiance's views on this cheating? Does he justify it? If not has he raised his opposition to his friend? Just out of curiousity.

I think it's a good sign that your fiance told you this, it means the level of trust in your relationship is good.

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He trusts her, sure, but he still shouldn't have told her. The woman being cheated on is a good friend of hers and she shouldn't feel guilty about not being able to tell her friend.

She also may not believe you. Put yourself in her shoes. You'd probably think "why is she telling me this? what's her motive? my bf would never do that" etc etc