So it has been about 4 or 5 months since I broke up with my gf...

And something odd has been going on ever since.

The first time we broke up I was seriously depressed and couldn't even think straight. However this time, the moment it all ended felt more like a cold vail had settled in. I didnt feel bad at all, and still dont.

However it's like I am emotionally handicapped now. I couldn't even feel bad for my own dad who had bladder cancer (he came out of it fine), but rather simply had numbers in my head about the chances of surgery going right and thinking of things to do depending on what the news is.

W...T...F!!!

Today is the first time I thought about this.

Do I need a new gf? Someone to actually seriously care about again?

Sometimes I do think about her (my ex) and I do have a craving sensation that will not leave for maybe a day or two.