when my boyfriend drinks he is a huge flirt and it really bothers me...how do i say something without sounding insecure and crazy
Printable View
when my boyfriend drinks he is a huge flirt and it really bothers me...how do i say something without sounding insecure and crazy
Well, it really depends on what you define as flirting.
If he's out grinding on women, grabbing them, or talking about how much he wants to sex them up, then you should definitely talk to him about it.
If he's just talking to others, then that's not really flirting depending on the content of the conversation.
In order to not appear insecure, you have to be sure it's really flirting and not just something that you have in your head.
It's not about being insecure. It's about being respected. Get that straight and you'll feel better about making that happen.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gigabitch [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Giga's right. That's straight up disrespect, and you need to call him on it.
I had a partner who was flirty with other girls in front of me. He also ended up cheating. Don't end up going down that path with him.
I would definitely say something. thats just messed up
Sounds like my ex...except without the drinking. She flirted with other guys WAY too much right in front of me. Even her own parents thought it was way to excessive. Turned out she was a cheating whore, lol.
I say you call him out on it. It's disrespectful. My ex was a complete bitch about it, she said it was harmless would get pissed off at me and then tell me I didn't trust her. Countless times I tried with her, sometimes she would say she wouldn't do it again...ended up doing it again. Then I'd confront her again, she'd get pissed off and the cycle would continue. Needless to say I was a dumb ass, should have listened to my instincts and dropped her right then and there.
I'm not saying to dump him, but definitely confront him about it first. If he gets pissed off at you, screw him. Flirting is ok to an extent, but in excess it's very disrespectful to the other. And IMHO if the other person doesn't feel comfortable with you flirting, then don't. Really flirting is just for fun, but if it's making the other person uncomfortable there's no need to continue it.
How about you say.."When you drink you get highly flirtatious and it bothers me"Quote:
Originally Posted by VLee [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
See how he responds..
i agree it does depend on what u define as excessive flirting ...my ex used to flirt harmlessly with girls and i used to laugh about it because i was secure about the relationship and i knew it was nothing...he luved the attention....i used to luv the fact that people found him attractive...i was happy to show him off...because he was with me and not them! but definitely if it bothers u and u think he might stray then ask him straight...ur instincts might indeed be telling u something
Get drunk too at let him see what you were doing, I mean flirt someone too. For sure he will stop drinking...:DQuote:
Originally Posted by VLee [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
just tell him straight out...STOP FLIRTING.....if he doesn't then you should flirt too! Watch how fast he stops flirting then...........
Quote:
Originally Posted by VLee [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Here is what you need to do....
tell him... talk to him, be completly honest... if you cant be prefectly honest with such things from the beggings its only goin to make things worse... i know im dealing with some issues of my own.. i am set to be married soon, and i have always had a fear of commitment...
i have always been able to tak to my girl about anything and it fixed it.. i just not fear, will i fail if i get married.. or kinda even worse will she allways wonder and fear if i talk to her about it... the answer is no... i just need to be brave enough to address the issue with her... or im wasting my time....
oh and men, we are all dumbasses from the get go... there is no prince charming, only your prince charming and one day you will learn he is just a flawed mortal man who is just a biger dumbass when he is drunk! to be honest, i do not, drink in access with out her around just to make sure, i dont hurt here... its somthing he needs to proactivly fix or you should not talerate it.
Hey, speak for yourself! It usually takes me a while to get to the level of "dumbass" in a relationship. ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by AmIwrong [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]