Hello all, the other day my girlfriend of over 6 years gave me the "i need to take a break" speech just in time for the holidays.
I am 35 and she is 33 and we have been dating for just over 6 years and with most relationships of that length we have had plenty of good and plenty of bad. But we have always gotten thru it. We did have a problem about 2 years ago and for a short while we seperated. We did get back togther and for me that was the signal that eventually we would get married. What kills me right now is that i have been working on plans for us to get married and she drops this on me. I also left my job over 10 years that she didn't like based off the fact we got back togther and we were going to work on a new career for me togther. I believe that a break means the worst for a relationship. During our talk i told her that if we are going to get married that "taking a break" during a marriage just cant happen. If we are married we have to work out our problems as a team and not run away from them. She isnt one to let go of past problems we have had very easily. In fact she is still angry with a few incidents that we had awhile back. So we had the "break talk" and it was very emotional and difficult. She wants to leave the option open during the time to see other people and we didnt put any time frame on the break. She spent the night and it was a very passionate night. She told me that she loves me deeply, couldn't imagine being with anybody else, would make a good husband and father but she still needs time to herself. All of which makes this so much harder because she is the only person i love and want to be with and now she could be gone after 6 years of ups and downs, learning about and loving each other its a huge emotional and life investment.
How do people feel about the "break"? Can it be a good thing for relationships? Anybody have a first or second hand information on "breaks" they have had or know about? The time apart is going to be very difficult as i really want to talk to her. Is it best to just let the person go and just hope they will come back to you and your relationship will be stronger for it?