Is Real Love out there?

You’ve got mail…

such an inspiring movie. I love the way two people can be attracted to one another for no aparant reason. They just seem to ‘click’. Oh, I wish I felt something like that once in my life. Then I would know what it feels like, I would know what to compare everything else with. Because now I really don’t know what love is... Isn’t that sad? Not knowing real, passionate love is like not knowing air. “What is life without love?”, I wonder.

I’m sorry, I’m in a verry melancholic mood now. It’s just that I love love. Finding The One is finding meaning to me. There are no words for it. And the sad bit is that I’m not even sure that my Real Love is out there... It’s heartbreaking.

Oh what wouldn’t I give to have someone like that in my life... Someone to hold me, comfort me, just be there. Someone who confides in me, who needs me and who completes me.

There are so many stories, so many tales. But are they true? Does real love exist? But how come others aren’t worried? How come they don’t think about it? I enjoy parties as much as any other, but still I think there has to be something more than that. This can’t be it...

But what if it is? Will I waste my life, looking for something that doesn’t exist?

Welcome Cinderella

Of course love exists but you are looking for the wrong thing.

Your user name is a clue to this ... remember, at the end of the Cinderella story, when they say "and they lived happily ever after" they never really explain how.

Love exists and it is great, but it's not a romanticized expectation that somehow, when you find it, everything will fall into place and be easy. Love is two people deciding (yes deciding, not a cosmic event) that their relationship makes both partners better than they would be apart.

Love is messy details and most of all, it's WORK!

You are right ... true love will give you "Someone to hold me, comfort me, just be there. Someone who confides in me, who needs me and who completes me." But notice ... you said "me" five times in that sentence ... so that's not love. Try replacing "me" with "each other" and you get closer to the mark.

Carl.

I'll also mention it's great when you find it.

It's great a week in, a month in, a year in.

But then after a while reality strikes, and it's not quite what you thought it'd be.

Oh, and everything Carl said is correct.

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Originally Posted by cinderellak [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

You’ve got mail…

such an inspiring movie. I love the way two people can be attracted to one another for no aparant reason. They just seem to ‘click’.

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In real life... people don't just 'click' or are attracted for no reason. Even in the movie, if you'll watch closely... they viewed life in similar ways and they had a lot in common, as well as having differences that complemented one another rather well. Having things in common and having intriguing differences help aid attraction.

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Originally Posted by cinderellak [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Oh, I wish I felt something like that once in my life. Then I would know what it feels like, I would know what to compare everything else with. Because now I really don’t know what love is... Isn’t that sad? Not knowing real, passionate love is like not knowing air. “What is life without love?”, I wonder.

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It's understandable that you see others that seem happy and you feel that you're missing out. However, you may overlook the fact that break ups, divorces, and affairs happen all the time. So love is more complicated and apparently harder to maintain than the movies and romanticized stories of childhood would have you believe.

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Originally Posted by cinderellak [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I’m sorry, I’m in a verry melancholic mood now. It’s just that I love love. Finding The One is finding meaning to me. There are no words for it. And the sad bit is that I’m not even sure that my Real Love is out there... It’s heartbreaking.

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You don't love love... you don't even know what it is.. so this statement has little meaning. You love the idea of love as it is all too often romanticized. There is no such thing as The One... if there was, it would be a horribly cruel world. Imagine finding that one person that you were suppose to be with and they die in a plane crash the next day. You'll have to spend the rest of your life in misery because you can only get one person who's The One for you. No, you are capable of falling in love many times in life with different people because of the traits they have and both of you being willing to make a relationship work. There is such a thing as Real Love, but it is often confused with infatuation, self-sacrifice, lechery, and friends with benefits.

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Originally Posted by cinderellak [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Oh what wouldn’t I give to have someone like that in my life... Someone to hold me, comfort me, just be there. Someone who confides in me, who needs me and who completes me.

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Just as Carl said... what you seek here is not love. Rather this is the longing to end the loneliness you feel. And though it is quite common, it should not be your only motivation for love. There should be a passion within you to want to truly care for someone, to want to hear their thoughts, hopes, and dreams, and to want to bring them happiness because you feel they deserve it somehow. You'll want to be yourself in a relationship with boundaries and having your own way from time to time... but you should still feel like pleasing them and taking delight in their company.

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Originally Posted by cinderellak [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

There are so many stories, so many tales. But are they true? Does real love exist? But how come others aren’t worried? How come they don’t think about it? I enjoy parties as much as any other, but still I think there has to be something more than that. This can’t be it...

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Love exists and the vast majority of stories either aren't true or they are half-truths. Others may not think about it because they are trying to construct their lives... have something to offer should someone they may one day love come into their lives.

Life is whatever you want it to be. If you want to chase the almighty dollar all your life, then for you, life will be about gaining wealth. If you feel that having a family is top priority for you, then life is about ushering in the next generation. Nothing in life is carved in stone... it is written only while you live it.. not before.

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Originally Posted by cinderellak [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

But what if it is? Will I waste my life, looking for something that doesn’t exist?

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If you search for what you currently think love is... then yes, the possibility exists that you will waste your life looking for something that doesn't exist. Romanticize love less and be more practical and pragmatic in your approach and understanding of love.

Hey Princess, there's no such thing as The One. Go read the soulmate thread.

Hey Aeredilia are you hot?

A round of applause of Carl and Aeradalia!

Beautifully orchestrating the words of the ideas and truths we're all so tired of reiterating!

I love new members.

Aeradalia is turning into our female version of Grkscp. At least in post length ;)

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Originally Posted by Charlie Boy II [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Hey Aeredilia are you hot?

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My boyfriend finds me attractive... but as they say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. He sees it, but I really don't.

Many have described my appearance as being 'cute' or ageless. I'm petite in stature, so it makes determining my age difficult for some. To most people I can appear to be anywhere from age 12 to early 20s. However, most seem to settle on me appearing about 16 or so.

So I think I'm less than 'hot,' as far as appearances go. But I'm not too terribly concerned about it. It's more fun watching people assume I'm a child until I start talking. The look on their face is positively hillarious. :D