HURT / relationships/ PAIN / etc. MY experience
It's hard to live sometimes. I'll make my story super-short:
I came from a hard place with a lot of violence and stuff. But I hold a lot of Christian values although I am not an official Christian. So I meet this girl in 2006 and we seem to hit off. I get attached. But we're SO different...
It's like, when I think about it now... That I met my exact opposite!! Even though I love her-- We are SO different in EVERY aspect of life. I know that my destiny is to cut it off--
But I have these feelings of guilt-- That I've done her wrong, that I messed it up... That I messed up my life...
In reality, I should blame HER. For being such a crazy, older, immoral person! I absolutely hate EVERY single thing about her. Somehow, I love her now. But this will never work.
This is one of the hardest things I will ever have to do because I really do love this person. But we are SO, *SO* wrong for each other!!! Why did God even let me meet her???!! Now I do love her..... But I think about life as in terms of thousands of years.................
I could never ever be with someone like her forever. Even though I now have love for her.
It's over now. How could God allow this? I thought the Bible said God would protect me, especially if I was a servant, which I have been!!
This is horrible!! But.... it happened. Now, I will be left with these questions... and this sadness......
I guess F it all. I know I could not be with her forever. I wish this would have never happened. I didn't learn ANYTHING. All I learned is that I actually hate her and people like her.
That's my story.