Is he just not bothered? I don't understand him..

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01-06-09, 09:34 PM
Jaelisha

Is he just not bothered? I don't understand him..

Well, I'm dating this guy (unofficially - were still getting to know each other) I'm 16 he's 19. Everything was going great, he probably still thinks it is, but I have my own personal problems getting in the way.

You see, I've never been in a relationship before, and he knows that, I had never kissed a guy, he knows that too.. But I have now, because we kissed a few days ago. In other words, im totally inexperienced.

We talk everyday on MSN but I feel like I'm trying too much because I'm the only one who always rings him. He keeps saying "I'll ring you later", "I'll call you tonight", "I'll call you from my friends phone later on today", etc.. He's said that around 8 times now, and yet.. no phone call? It's always me ringing, or else nothing happens. The other day I said "Why do you always say you're going to ring, and then you never do?" and he replied "I forget :sad2:".. Whatever thats supposed to mean..

However, on MSN he always talks first, he calls me 'baby, boo, hunny, darling, beautiful, etc..' but I dont really feel comfortable with calling him any of those words back just yet, because we're not official.

We live about 1hour away from each other by train, I'm based in North West London and he's from South East. We've met up around 4 times, but he has always come to my area.. So I know he does like me, if he's willing to come all the way to my area to see me rather than meeting half way.

But I can't tell if he cares? I don't really want to drag this on if nothing is going to happen as I have my own personal family problems that I'm dealing with aswell.

So what d'you guys think? It's only the phone call thing thats bugging me, he's saying he's going to do something but then he never does it, and I've just let it go 8 times. I would like to tell him, but I don't want to overreact about it because we are only dating, if we do become official, then I know for sure I won't stand for it.
01-06-09, 11:49 PM
luna338

I know this sounds harsh and its going to be hard for you, but it is something that will show how much he cares.

Start blowing off all other forms of communication besides a telephone call. You have already made it clear that you were upset by his lack of calling, so if he really wants you he needs to step it up.

And he if is really into he will call. Don't settle for anything less than what you want!
02-06-09, 12:53 AM
lastwish

The other signs are telling me he does care. But as for the phone call, maybe he's just busy at the moment or its a habit. Plus, some guys say "I'll call you later" meaning I will contact you in some way later on and doesn't neccesarily mean they will actually call you back. I wouldn't think too much about it.
02-06-09, 12:57 AM
Yggdrasil

Quote:

Originally Posted by lastwish [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

The other signs are telling me he does care. But as for the phone call, maybe he's just busy at the moment or its a habit. Plus, some guys say "I'll call you later" meaning I will contact you in some way later on and doesn't neccesarily mean they will actually call you back. I wouldn't think too much about it.

I'd go with luna338's suggestion. Cut all contact lines EXCEPT the phone and see what happens. You may be amazingly surprised about the result if you can get yourself into doing so for about a week.
03-06-09, 03:15 AM
soulsurvivor23

You're young, no need to feel worried about being inexperienced. Even though on TV it appears that everyone, even kids, are out and about, living their lives like adults, that's not always the case. And if you're ever with someone with more experience than you, just tell him that (just like you did in this case) and that would relieve the tension you feel and hopefully the guy would make you feel more comfortable..

As for the situation, as someone else suggested I feel as though he's being too casual in the situation, so yeah it's important for you to cut of msn and all of that other stuff and see if he calls you or makes another step. It would not be good for you to put your heart on the line for someone who's demonstrating luke warm feelings towards you.