I Tried To Break Up With My Girlfriend

I tried to break up with my girlfriend today, I went to her place and we sat down and spoke and I explained I can't do it anymore. I feel smothered and feel down everyday, with no will to continue it. She started sobbing and crying hysterically, I felt really bad. She begged me to try and see if things would work out. I didn't know what to do, so I said we could carry on and try, because I felt really really bad.

I know I should of just been man about it, and broken it off, but I couldn't stand to see her like that. Now I am really unhappy and don't know what to do.

You think that's a stand up thing to do? Make your woman cry?

You know what you did is wrong. That's why you feel better.

If you want to be a man, stick around and make things work out.

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Originally Posted by doppelgaenger [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

You think that's a stand up thing to do? Make your woman cry?

You know what you did is wrong. That's why you feel better.

If you want to be a man, stick around and make things work out.

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Huh???

Uhhh. No.

Real men stick to their guns. If the relationship isn't working, it isn't working. You're doing her a big injustice by first leading her to believe that sort of hysteric behavior will get her anywhere in life and second by leading her on.

Break it off. She'll get over it.

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Originally Posted by Gribble [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Uhhh. No.

Real men stick to their guns. If the relationship isn't working, it isn't working. You're doing her a big injustice by first leading her to believe that sort of hysteric behavior will get her anywhere in life and second by leading her on.

Break it off. She'll get over it.

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How do I do that. She thinks everything is fine again now, I don't know if she notices I'm not as happy though.
We only been together for 10 months.

I don't know how to approach her again about it.

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Originally Posted by littleninja007 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

How do I do that. She thinks everything is fine again now, I don't know if she notices I'm not as happy though.
We only been together for 10 months.

I don't know how to approach her again about it.

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Do it NOW. I think a lot of guys in this situation wait until something comes up again that they can use as a "new" excuse for breaking up. That's crap. Go back to her and tell her that you thought it over and you are sure the relationship is over.

A guy who can't break up with someone is EXTREMELY unattractive! Is there any girl here who would even want to stay with a guy who's tried to break up with you, but gave in when you cried??

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Originally Posted by littleninja007 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

How do I do that. She thinks everything is fine again now, I don't know if she notices I'm not as happy though.
We only been together for 10 months.

I don't know how to approach her again about it.

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Just be honest and upfront with her.. tell her that you've thought about giving it another shot and working things out but it's honestly not what's good for you or what you want.

She'll probably cry and beg-- but that's a normal reaction when you don't want someone to leave you. Staying with her because of it won't change anything for you.

he didn't even say what was wrong

she manipulated you, break up, be honest and leave

End. It. Now.

The longer you wait the harder it will be for her, if you care at all about her you would do it now....

You clearly want nothing to do with her, you can't tell me that you only been unhappy now after 10 months?

You causing her unnecessary heart ache cause you didn't have the balls to break it off sooner...

Get a hold of yourself and do what you should've done months ago NOW

Sigh.. you gave in to her pleads because you felt guilty.

Best thing you can do is have another talk with her, explain calmly that you have thought about what was said and that you understand that it's hard for her to break up, but that in the long run, it's for the better.

Explain her breaking up is hard to do.

Tell her it's not her fault and she shouldn't feel guilty, rejected or bad about herself. These things do happen.

Then leave, and break all contact. And I mean, ALL contact. No phone, txt, msn, email, nothing. Block her phone number, msn and email if needed.

Don't make a long drama about this. All you are doing is hurting yourself and her by turning this into a drama.

Once you're alone, give yourself the time to grieve, feel shitty, angry, frustrated, cry, yell, whatever it takes to get it out of your system. About 3 weeks from then.. you'll feel a lot better. So will she.

And resist the urge to see her, contact her, etc.. during those 3 weeks.

I know I should do it as soon as possible. It's really hard though. I have no idea how to go about it.
Things were fine at the beginning of the relationship, but last few months they started going down hill. I feel smothered as she is very clingy, she needs to see me everyday she says. If I never had football practice 2 days a week, we'd see each other every single day. I have mentioned it before but she got upset at me about it.

Now I really can't do it anymore, it's so draining.
But I will try tell her as soon as possible.
Thanks to all for your help.

You shouldn't stick around for long after you tell her. Just say "I thought about it some more, and this relationship just isn't fair to either of us. I'm not happy, and you deserve to be with someone who loves you more. I'm sorry this hurts, but you'll be fine in the end. It's probably best we not contact each other to allow us time to heal."

Then leave.

If you are genuinely concerned about her, you can call her mom and tell her you are worried because you broke up with her and she took it hard. Let her mom help her grieve.

vashti... that reply is excellent. That's also helped me a lot, thanks.