he is asian and quiet. i am american and was raised in a single parent american household with a twist. My mother has been deaf my whole life and my father died before I turned two so i was raised in a life of solitude and have a strong need to communicate.
it is very obvious that we give and receive love and affection in different ways. We have been dating for six years now but for the last three years we have been maintaining a long distance relationship. He moved an hour south and i see him on weekends but sometimes we go two to three weeks without seeing each other. When I don't see him for a while I want to hug him and show him how much i have missed him. He told me that he doesn't like to hug and kiss so that ruined it for me. i no longer greet him with a smile, hug and kiss knowing that it does nothing for him. he will go days without talking to me and when he does call it is just to ask if i am okay and the calls almost never last more than a minute or two. he never calls to talk to me and when we are together on weekends it is usually only for one night and we are so rushed that there is no communication going on. recently i told him that i felt very lonely and i needed him to invest more in me and communication was missing.
he told me that i should try to engage him more.
I don't understand how his lack of affection and communication is now my fault when he was like that long before i came along. i already feel like i carry the conversations and i am the only one who shows affection outside of the bedroom.
am i kidding myself thinking that he is going to put in the effort to change when he doesn't think there is anything wrong? because he is so stingy with his affection and the only time i see it is when we are having sex, i feel like that is all we have and i want more.
