holding on to someone you truely love

forgive me but i will post this once more

i'm 24 and i'm not bad looking, i have a few problems with my confidence and self esteem, and i struggle with my speech sometimes because i have a stutter.

i first met this girl at work and it was love from the very start, she only needed to walk past me and i could feel love inside. We then started to go out together and speak on facebook everynight, but it ended because she thought i was always too shy with her. I wont lie..she hurt me very much because i loved her deeply, it was very hard.

anyway we then got close again very close until she left for lithuania for 6 weeks, she text me and always sent kisses at the end of messages, she told me she would miss me, and then a week ago she told me that she loved me.

But we never talked about what we are, friends who love each other, or more.
Forgive me for thinking she was my girlfriend but it turnd out she was'nt. I wrote her a poem on facebook and told her it was about her. And she said "i will tell you one last time, we will never be together, never"
I'm so confused about what to do, i've sent a message saying i want to be friends and that i love her" but i dont know why she changes her mind, i dont know how she can love me, and then leave me again

this girl would never play games with my heart, she's very buetiful inside,
i get very close and then rejected. She comes back to england in 3 weeks time, and i know i will fall in love again, i know it will hurt to chase her again and i know she will make me cry, but its worth it because i have never felt this way. I'm just confused about her and about why she changes her mind,

i know she like's me, because of how she looks at me, and She told me that she loves me, she sends messages on facebook that look romantic. If there is a glimmer of hope then i will hang on once more.

I have to hold on, or i will regret it, and then if its very clear that i'm not right for her then i will let her go, i love her enough to leave her alone, or to be friends, i can love her like a sister because i never want to lose contact, i know she needs good people around her.

Any advice?
i know people will say to let her go, but i never want to lose contact

Give her some time.
Tell her, show her somehow you can live without her and she will come back. At least as a friend. If you really want it.