how to lose my crush and stop stalking
Please do not give me tips to get the girl but in general how can I reduce my feeling for her.
Here is my story.
I am kind of short, nerdy, greeky, and loser type of a guy. I love this girl in my class (my class contain 320 students). She is beyond beautiful in my eye, I love her personality and her characteristics and almost everything about her. She doesn't know me that good. I told her, I liked her via facebook but she rejected me. I still have an access to her facebook account since we both are in the same class.
I am so addicted to her, I dream of her almost every night. This is first time in my life I ever felt this way. I look at her pictures like 15 times a day. When I look at her picture, I cry because I know I am not going to her. I always think about her; it is so bad that it is effecting my education and my life. I think, I am in depression because of her. I love her so much, I am willing to suffer and die for her. I am like a semi-stalker, I know everything about her, I keep doing research online about her. Even though we are still stranger, what hurt her, hurts me even more. For example, one of her close friend did not include her in her top 5 friends, this got me so angry and mad.
Totally weird is the fact that I hate being her boyfriend/husband because I will be embarrassing her (because everyone view me as a loser, it is the reality). In other words, her friends will look down at her and will have pride that they have much better bf/husband than her.
I think, I still have a chance because she doesn't know me well, she might give me a chance after knows me real good in real life. One thing about her is she very hard to get (I do not think she falls for guys easily and she not those flirting type girls).
I try next semester to get her, as for now, please help me get rid of my feelings.