Need some advice on this one...

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13-01-10, 10:10 AM
TheWizard

Need some advice on this one...

I'll keep it short and sweet.

I've found out recently that a female friend of mine might be moving away sometime this year. I really dig this girl, and I've been making the effort to keep myself out of the friend zone and flirt in a way that she'd have to be really detached to not realize I was into her that way. I'm about as positive as one can get I suppose that she's feeling something - some real chemistry is there.

The icing on the cake is that she has a boyfriend, but she posed the question that if she was thinking of leaving him and where she lives to go for this change of scenery then why is she with him in the first place? I may have read too much into that but it piqued my interest and sparked this question I'm about to ask.

I'm wondering if it's time to lay it out for her about my feelings? - I'm not going to keep her from going if she wants though indirectly I suppose that could be a possibility just because of the nature of the argument. Just seems like perhaps she's made an opening and I'm wondering if it's the right move to open up to her a bit more overtly. Say something like "I just want you to know that I think we could have something real here, something I don't want to wonder about if you move away before I can say anything... I don't want to miss that possibility and kick myself for the rest of my life."

Thoughts?

EDIT: It's only a possibility she is moving away, nothing is concrete yet but if it happens it might happen fast.
14-01-10, 12:19 AM
Primo

Of course let her know, boyfriend or not. Don't leave yourself wondering what if.
14-01-10, 12:23 AM
shheadz

I would absolutely tell her.
14-01-10, 12:26 AM
iateyourcookie

Yeah, I would tell her as well if I were you. Best of luck.
14-01-10, 12:51 AM
davidtorres

its hard to jump from the friend ladder to the BF ladder. also, she has a bf. But feel free to tell her how you feel. However, remember that it will never be the same if you get rejected.
14-01-10, 03:12 AM
girl68

Tell her.

At the same time tell her that you're not interested in being the "other guy". If she wants you she can have you but she can't have the both of you.
14-01-10, 02:26 PM
TheWizard

Quote:

Originally Posted by Primo [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Of course let her know, boyfriend or not. Don't leave yourself wondering what if.

Yeah, I don't want to get stuck in the "what if" category. She's invited me over on Saturday for the day to hang out while her BF is out of town... I'm sure there will be some deep conversation involved.

The big thing for me is like Dave puts it... trying to change ladders can kill the friendship. Bah, feelings. :tough: