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Moving Slow?
My girlfriend and I have been dating for a little bit over 9 months now. It is both of ours first real serious relationship. She is unexperienced and so am I. We both have done nothing more than just making out. In the past 9 months the furthest I have gotten her is to take off her shirt, with bra still on. I've tried to talk to her about this before but it goes no where. She seems to get irritated or just doesn't want to talk about it. It has gottan better recently as i've brought things up again. One thing she has told me is that she's afriad of "being caught" but we don't have a lot of time where we are truly alone to be together without her or my parents being home. We both want our relationship to last, and both are looking for a long-term relationship. She says she loves me, and I lover her, but without that physical connection it is really hard to see it. I understand if she is nervous about moving things further, we both are inexperienced, but after 9 months I would like to think that she has enough trust and faith in me to know that I'm here for her and wouldn't hurt her. I'm 18 and going into my third semester of college. She is 17 and still a senior in high school. I can't tell if she just isn't ready yet, or maybe she just interested in messing around at all? It's very frustrating being a guy and not fully being able to control certain feelings I have. I don't know what I'm asking for by posting here, maybe just some feedback, input, advice, or maybe i'm just venting. Either way let me know what you think.
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So what is the issue here - you not being able to control your male desires or you genuinely wanting to get close to her?
There are communication issues here that are more pertinent than you not getting any.
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Me genuinely wanting to get close to her. I can't seem to get her to really open up to me no matter what I do. That seems to be the main issue or so i would think. If she could tell me how she felt or what she wanted it would be a lot easier, but it's so hard to get her to talk to me about it.
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She's not ready yet. You want sex. This is perfectly natural but you may want to consider easing up on the pressure. There's always masturbation or breaking up & finding a GF more sexually mature.
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Yeah, some girls are just like this man, it's nothing wrong with how slow you guys are moving but at the same time, I understand your frustration. As Indi stated, don't pressure her into sex. You can either wait it out, or move on. It'll be difficult to wait it out, no lie, but, it's soooo worth the wait. Especially if this is your first love. Don't rush into any decisions, and if you REALLY love her, keep taking it slow and keep that communication flowing in the relationship.