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Serious Help Needed
Me and my girlfriend split up not so long ago, it was all my fault. I kissed another girl whilst very very drunk very early in our relationship and she found out. I kept it a secret to protect her, because i love her, not because i'm a cheat. She split up with me & told me she needs her space. Some people tell me i should give her space and she will come back, but at the same time i keep thinking that she wont. I've done all the sincere apology, and brought her flowers. I find it very difficult to stay out of contact with her for just a couple of days, and always end up speaking to her. My head tells me to tell her im just going to stop fighting and move on, but my heart tells me to stick it out and keep away, just hoping she comes back, that feels like im being strung along. I know i was wrong, im 18 and i learned a lot whilst being with her but she says she cant trust me rite now, she told me we MIGHT b able to have fresh start in a few months, thts not specific enuf for me tho :( Im ready to follow through with any of your advice tonight.
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Our advice is the same: leave her alone. If she wants you to give you a chance to prove your trustworthiness back she will let you know.
You are in no place whatsoever to demand that she be more specific with her answer. She wants space, give it to her. You made a choice to screw up, you are now knee deep in the consequences. Deal with it.
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Okay then, i do agree with you but its very hard. It was a genuine accident and to be honest now im just scared that i've lost her for good. Thats what beats me up the most, that i had it perfect and ruined it because of a selfish drunk action. I do hate myself for it. I hear about all this stuff saying that if you keep away from her then it works out better because she will miss you, thats if she really does want to give it another go. And ive heard that if you keep getting in touch, even if its just a text, she will be pushed away and even if she did want to sort it out, by constantly being in touch, she will change her mind. From your point of view, as a girl, is that honestly true? Because i am so scared that if i do give her space, she will find somebody else. Its a head and heart situation im afraid. I know in my heart i can make her happy should she want to give me another chance. But my head tells me to let her go and move on with my life, enabling her to find somebody else, which would break me in half. Im not proud of myself for what i did, at all. I just need that chance to prove it wont happen again, but im scared i wont get that chance with her.
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You know what? I don't give a rats ass if it's hard for you. Tough. I'm glad you're not stupid though. You've realized how bad it was. You are aware that you can throw a whole relationship down the drain becasue of it.
The fact remains: these are the consequences. I'm not going to butter you up and tell you she'll come floating back into your arms.
She's been cheated on. If I were, I don't think I'd ever take him back. I don't care how much space you gave me, how much you spend on flowers nor the apology that came with it. She may of may not be like me. But if she is there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.
You need to give her the space she asked for. How'd you feel if you were wronged and then wronged a hundred times more because she keeps coming back? I'd feel pissed off, annoyed, hurt, and annoyed again.
I'd like to point out that I don't care about what you think you know (in regards to you thinking you can make her happy). You BROKE the relationship. You have now taken all measures to show her you're sorry. She may or may not forgive you. Leave that choice up to her. I'll repeat for effect: these are the consequences of your actions. (Sorry doesn't make them go away). You may or may not get the chance to prove to her that you can make her happy. Deal with that. Learn from this. Do not make this mistake again... with the NEXT girl. It's a hard lesson to learn. But at least you learned it young.
Anyways: Deal with the fact she doesn't want anything to do with you; you tried, you failed. Get on with life don't wait around for months. And certainly leave her alone, she's hurt and in pain and the last thing she wants to see/ hear from is the very thing that caused her so much of it.
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Well you dont mince your words jeeeeeeez
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That's right son.
Though it's not ALL bad. I am aware of the fact you realized the wrong you did. And if you never do something so stupid again I give you props.
However, what is done is done. You need to also learn that there is consequences and this is it.
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She said she needs space. I suggest you give it to her, or she will just cut you off for good.
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You!OP! You post that same thread one more time under different title ,to make it harder to find, and I'll ban You. Watch out! I have headaches!
Une petite blague avec ces menaces,mais vraiment j'ai mal a la tete putain...:/
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Why would i want to make it harder to find? I have nothing to achieve by doing that. I'm new here. I posted it to this forum, then saw a topic where i could ask specifically for a girls input, so i thought id post teh same question to them. Hardly a massive crime.
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But why the hell would you do that if You see that ANYWAY the only people who answer to Your problem ARE GIRLS .
The cross with a circle upon is a sign of a female , the circle with the arrow on a side is a sign of male, if You didn't learn that on biology. People: look, read and surmise.