How to rebuild trust.

Hi there,

I would like to ask all of the females on this forum what is the best way for man to rebuild their trust to you?

To sumerise, I was with my ex for 2 years and we ended not so long ago. I treated her well and gave the relationship everything. I can say that in the two years that we were together we never had one fight. But after we ended I invaded her privacy and broke her trust. I instantly felt guilty and told her what I had done as I can not be deceitful.

Naturally, she went mad and I feel so bad that I hurt her.At first she told me that she never wants to speak to me again, but after a few days although she is still extremely mad she has decieded to give me one more chance and let me take her out this weekend.

I understand that rebuilding trust is something that you cannot just apologise for and it to be there the next morning. I know that it takes time and a lot of effort. I would give everything to take back what I have done, but I cant and I would like to rebuild and prove how truely sorry I am. I can honestly say that I would never hurt her again.

What would be the best place to start and prove to you?

Thanks

You may never get past this. Accept that first and foremost. Accept the fact that she may need extra reassurance from you for the duration of your relationship. It's really up to her now on how she wants this to go. Either she can forgive you and you can fully move past it, or she'll say she forgives you, but still feel the need to bring up the time in which you breached her trust.

Is this something you're prepared to deal with?

I just want to make things right. I am ready to make amends for what I have done. I know I may never get back with her but I want to prove that I am sorry and that I never meant to hurt her and I am the man that she fell in love with.

We spoke on the phone a few times over the last few days and have had lots banter over text messages and things seem to be great between us as friends. We are still going out on Saturday as friends and I guess we will just have to see how it goes. She did say this morning that trust takes a lot of time to rebuild, which I knew, and that it could take a year. She also said that there is no chance for us to be a couple this year. But at the moment that doesnt overly bother me I just want to make things up to her. That is the most important thing to me at the moment.

what makes you so sure you will never hurt her again ?

trust is difficult to rebuild after it is broken. once broken, maybe she can still give you one more chance. twice or thrice broken, it is going to be more and more difficult because every time you hurt her, a part of her heart (love) for you dies. you may love a person, but because you can't trust him again, you decide to leave him for fear of being hurt AGAIN.