Kids really DO say the darndest things....dating/parenting.

Not sure where else to post this as its a little different but I know there are parents on the board here but I'd like anyone's input...

So most of you know I am dating a single father of 2 kids. Ages 6 and 8. He's been divorced for about 5 years. We've been together about 8 months. I love him very much and he's the only guy I have ever really seen myself being with, as in marriage. Some day. I love his girls too and realize this is a package deal.

Kids will be kids and of course they get curious. At about 3 months of dating we were all out for lunch one Sunday when the oldest asked out of the blue, "Are you and Jenny going to get married?" I couldn't look up from the table. Soo awkward. I think he just gave her that look that parents give where you know its time to shut your mouth right now.

I guess I assumed that after that occured he'd maybe have talked to the girls about our situation. Its what I would have done in the situation were I in his shoes. He's very open and up front with them. His father was recently diagnosed with cancer and he sat the girls down for that and let them know grandpa has an illness and will be getting treatment for that.

Since that time every couple months another random and stop you in your tracks question will come up..."Are you gonna have a baby?" and "Do you wear that heart necklace because you love daddy?"

Saturday night my bf had two other couples and their kids over. My bf was putting in a different movie for the kids downstairs and the youngest came up to me at at the table and asked me, in front of another couple, "If you and daddy ever have a wedding would you be my step mom?" I literally didn't know what to say. I think I answered, "Maybe, if that happens someday." And sort of changed the subject. I am super private (in real life) and wasn't comfortable with the question too much but definitely not comfortable with the question brought up in front of people I don't know too well.

Like I said, I love him more than I can say. I guess I wonder if the girls should be talked to by him. I mean he and I have never spoken about our future as far as the big "M" word goes. I know I'm a part of his future because we have plans and its always "us" and "we" when he talks about the future. I don't want to over step my boundaries or tell him what to do but I don't know. Should they be spoken to about this matter by their dad? I'm glad his daughter is comfortable enough with me to ask questions, don't get me wrong. Its just a hard subject and one without answers. They've had such a different childhood than I had.

Ask him how he wants you to deal with it when they ask questions like that, especially in front of company. That's incredibly awkward.

ooh can i share my friend's story?

By all means....

ok, so this girl i know has a 7 year old son and went on vacation to Egypt with the son, leaving her husband at home.
when they came back she told me that she had an affair with an arab there. So her kid was showing their pictures to others and and on one of the pictures he was saying that it was mommy's boyfriend. so she ran to him and said, Alex why are you saying that? and he said that it's cuz you slept with him every night. so she told him not to tell daddy. and Alex said why, and she said, if daddy finds then he's gonna leave us.

how sad is that

How pathetic it is :/

She should end up in 'Worst parents ever' section... What a cunt.

I think you should talk to him and tell him that you would feel more comfortable if your situation was explained to them so something like what happened in front of his friends doesn't happen again.

I'm also seeing a woman with a little girl, she is only 9 months though so it isn't really that big of a deal in terms of that although we have already talked about the fact that we don't want her to build up to much attachment to me if for some reason it doesn't work out....although I have known her for 10 years and there was only about a 2 year period of time we didn't talk so I have a pretty good feeling that things will work out...however we have tried to plan for the worst case scenario with her daughter in mind.

Talk about embarrassing though...that 9 month old can fart like a grown man...I'm not just talking about smell but sound...I mean it sounds like a walrus is farting and of course everybody looks at me....everybody thinks I'm some nasty man walking around with a baby and farting.

yeah, she's been really weird lately

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by dewilliams2 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Talk about embarrassing though...that 9 month old can fart like a grown man...I'm not just talking about smell but sound...I mean it sounds like a walrus is farting and of course everybody looks at me....everybody thinks I'm some nasty man walking around with a baby and farting.

---

Haha, thats hilarious.

Kids like certainty and they are not as comfortable with the status quo like adults.

I think people can take a page from their books, certainty is good for the relationship.

I would be curious as to what HE tells them when they ask him those questions.

I got together with my husband when my daughter was eight. I was VERY clear with her about how serious we were through the different stages and what this meant for her. She never asked awkward questions because she already knew what was going on.

I think your boyfriend should be more straightforward with his kids. I hate it when people don't tell their kids the whole story.

Little boys would be so much easier, the most thought provoking question they would ask would be: "Why is your nose so big?"