Need some advice... 3 year relationship

Been in a relationship for about 3 years now.. she was my first and I was hers...or so I thought.

About a year ago, I found out she wasn't as innocent as I thought. I found out she went down on her ex. For everyone that's more "experienced", this might not matter, but I thought she was my first for everything, and she lied about it for 2 years, and I ended up finding out she wasn't (I found out, she didn't tell me).

At the time, I wanted to break up, and she gave me a free pass to do whatever I wanted to do, in order for us to stay together. Despite being crushed, I just wasn't that kind of person to do that; I figured it wouldn't solve anything.

However, over the past year, it's been eating away at me...there isn't a week that goes by that I don't think about it, and I think about that free pass that was given to me back then. Now, she's telling me the free pass doesn't exist any more, but this thing is constantly nagging and bothering me to the core, I'm wondering if I should just do something about it. I don't want to cheat (there have been a couple times where I could have, and I'm sure there will be more times in the future), but maybe that'll be the only thing that'll even things out? I don't know what to do anymore. I've talked to her about it countless times (she just leaves me alone for a few days until I get over it), and I just can't let it go. What should I do?

Sorry to hear about that....

I advise you to take a break from her..
Be apart for a while.
It's not fair that she walks away from a situation she started,and the fact that she lied to you,
And you should feel upset.
Her giving you a free pass to make things even isn't mature either.

If I were in your situation I'd definitely consider some time apart and see what happens...

Not so more to date other people, but for you to get your thoughts together and also kind of a test for her...

I honestly don't think you should let yourself be eaten from the inside... That's a big deal...