I know it's a bit lengthy.. but Really need some advice. Thanks!?

Well I guess am going to try and put this as simply as I can. I have a friend (who is now my best friend) and have known for just under two years. Long story short- we became friends AFTER initially meeting at a party and kissing , to which a few months later I realised- althought she approached me, she had an instinct about me which drover her to it. But that instinct and feeling developed into feelings for me as someone she could love and trust- but more as a just a friend. She is noiw a very close friend and I have told her my feelings developed slightly differently. She will always be my friend but I feel something more. Beyond that I have saved face, as she only says to me when we been drinking that she really really loves me- but outside of that it seems obvious to me she does not find me attractive in that way, or want anything more. only once since that first meeting two years ago has she kissed me in a more than friendly way - and that took me aback. But it was one day when I was quite down, so am unsure what motivated her. I have mentioned in passing the way I feel about her, but just like if she having a bad hair day , saying- well u know I always think ur gorgeous, whatever and reminding her in a way that will make her know she is loved.
But she is still very tactile and holds my hand , but sometimes gets frustrated over small things. Like if I am unsure about some topic she is talking about or who someone is- (she is unbleievably
intelligent- and has travelled so much and is very culturally educated)- and it's hard to keep up anyway.

Beyond that I now feel nervous when I am around her, and she says- are u listening to what I just said?! I get worried am going to say wrong thing, look silly or if something goes wrong or she upset that I do or say the wrong thing as a friend. One day I pulled my hand away as I was concious my hands were quite dry from some cleaning I had done earlier and I was embarrased. But when I did she said- ooooh fine! I will never touch u EVER again. But she knows full well how much I like her, and I just explained why I had done it. But now it's getting hard as I am upset if I feel I let her down or not as intelligent or can't help her out as I want to as a friend for whatever reason..I have started to take loads of classes, read lots and educate myself even more. It is starting to pay off now..Ia am noticing a change in my knowledge, as Ishe does, but I still know it is not enough. I am still trying to deal with the feelings aswell. But sometimes it is too much. I see her at least every 2nd day and I am beginning to think maybe I should try and loosen myself from her company a bit..but how do I do this without as I say letting her down, upsetting her or making myself look awkward and foolish by telling her the truth? I already feel so lacking intelligence and confidence when I next to her...but it does not take away the love I feel when I am in her company. Please help. I dunno what to do- she is my best friend. Sorry for it sounding so pathetic- but just really hurts

-And yes she IS bisexual. lol