Does she just wanna be friends?

Hello all

I asked for some advice here not long ago (thread: [url]http://www.loveforum.net/showthread.php?t=4173[/url]). I went to some races without her, and one day when we were talking and I told her how awesome it had been, she said that she'd really like to go and we went together this friday. Unfortunately it was pretty disapointing compared to what it's used to be because the people that takes care of the practical stuff weren't there. But even though we were not there for more than an hour and didn't get to race much, I think she thought it was pretty cool.

Afterwards we went out having a few drinks and we met some of her friends. When I had to decide if I was going to keep drinking beer or switch to soda to be able to drive home I asked if I could sleep at her place. Her answer was that we should have another drink and we'd figure something out.

We ended up partying until 8 am and had a really good time. Nothing special happened though, other than us holding hands as we went to sleep. The next morning (or rather late afternoon) we talked for a couple of hours, but again just about the usual stuff. We kinda agreed that we should go to the races again some other time, and I mentioned that she should bring her son too.

As she dropped me off where I had parked my car, I asked if she'd like to go have dinner sometime next week. I think it came as a surprise to her and she seemed to think about it for a couple of moments before answering that she too busy next week. I said ok and suggested that we might figure something out some other time and she just said yes.

That evening I went to a party at some friends and I sent her a couple of text messages, but she didn't answer them... I'm afraid she's just looking to be friends, but what do you guys think? I'd rather have her as a friend than not at all, but the feelings I have for her goes beyond being friends.

It sounds like she either wants to be friends or she wants more time to make a decision. You say she has a kid, so it would be especially bad if she were too quick to date people... She wouldn't (shouldn't) want the kid to get used to having a different guy around ever few months, you know? I'd say give it some time and see if your relationship gets any closer. If not, then you should probably just stay friends.

As I mentioned in the previous thread we work together, but I don't see her every day as we're in different departments and if we see each other we usually don't have time to do more than say hello. I've gotten her number since writing the other thread though.

I know that her having a son probably makes her be more cautious about who she takes home for him to see, so he doesn't see her with another guy every other week. I've only been at her place twice, but since she only has partial custody I've never met her son. She showed me pictures of him though and I told her that I'd like to meet him sometime.

My question is what should my next move be? Should I keep asking her out, or wait for her to make a move?

To make things even more complicated I kinda have this nagging feeling that she is seeing one of my co-workers from my department. It's not official, but for about six months it's been know to everyone that he is seeing someone just for the sex. We've been teasing him and pumping him for information about it like we always do in our department (everyone knows we're just kidding around), but he hasn't revealed anything, not even a name. The two times I've been partying with the girl I like and her friends, his name has been mentioned and this last time one of her friends mentioned them all being at a party at her (the friends) place the evening before a company event where we where all supposed to go. He called in sick that morning, but we later found out that he had been at a girls place (the one we've been trying to get information about since) and he hasn't denied it. The only thing that doesn't match up is the town she supposedly lives in, but that was a rumor started by someone else and he just said "yeah, whatever" not wanting to reveal anything.
This colleague is one of my best friends, so what do I do? Do I ask him about it and risk being made a fool of if it's not true (in my whole department that is :astonish: ), or should I just forget about it and rely on her to tell me if we go any further? My colleague has no idea that I'm interested in her so he won't tell me on his own.