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How do you make friendly small talk with a girl? How do you capture her interest? Also, how do make her laugh? I especially need help on the latter because I just don't tend to to see the humor in things myself. Any help you can provide on either topic is greatly appreciated.
Well, I'm a girl... and I generally like guys who don't think they are all that. Don't try too hard to impress her... because then you seem a little too obvious. Kind of make it casual and just find out what her interests are. Keep jokes clean and making sense. That's my advice for ya.
I know they always say it but, just try to be yourself. One thing I've learned about conversation is that the conversation has to be two sided, that means that both parties have to be interested in what is being said. The best conversationalists I know are good at changing the subject until they land on one both people are interested in. Try to listen to her when she talks and THINK about what she says. Don't feel like you have to respond a certain way to please her. Pick out clues in what she says follow the clues, ask her to expand on certain things. Don't try to act like you know about something that you know nothing about, she will respect you more if you are honest, maybe ask her to explain more about a certain subject... for example if she says she likes to ride horses and you know nothing about it tell her as much, ask her what her favorite thing about riding is... if it sounds like something you might want to experience, use this to your advantage, plan a date around her teaching you how to ride and then suprise her. Use conversation to learn about each other, to get ideas about dates and romantic things to do, to comfort each other when you've had a bad day. Don't talk just for the sake of talking because that will get you nowhere.
Hope this helps,
Tennyson
But first stick in a quick witty joke. Something along the lines of, "I've never ridden a horse. The closest I've gotten was a merry-go-round. But I've gotten pretty good riding those if that's any indication. I only fall off like half the time now . . ."Quote:
for example if she says she likes to ride horses and you know nothing about it tell her as much, ask her what her favorite thing about riding is...
Some people just aren't good at witt and humor... it doesn't mean that they are socially handicapped it just means thats not thier style. Say what feels natural... if jokes don't come naturally to you DON'T use them. Confidence is about 1000 times more important than humor, and if you are trying to force humor it will seem like you aren't confident enough to just be yourself.
And ask OPEN ENDED questions. Not "yes or no" questions, questions which can launch her into stories. She has fun telling them to you, you become a great listener and interject with some laughs at the funny parts and some "Yeahs" here or there and she'll love that you took the time to listen to her.
Rod Steele
Well i agree with xareon that both conversations need to be two sided. One thing about girls is that the chances of them "drooling" over you is higher when you know ur timing. for example, don try to butt in on her talk whenever shes talking. let her finish her sentence and u listen well. well.. u don realli need to listen but at least to her it'll seems that your providing a listening ear to her.
Another thing is to be patient and witty. Make jokes. Have fun. Treat her as your best friend instead of some girl your chasing to be your gf. That'll ease the tensions up within yourself.
Lastly, be a gentleman. Its not good to lie but its not wrong to hide some bad details about yourself right? Keep those stuff to yourself till you're closer to her. If your outside, and you don't know what topics to talk about, LOOK around you. Make comments on anyting. Keep the silences away. Its a dread. Well.. thats what i can help you with. Hope it helps~
I think the most important thing is to just have things to talk about in general. As girls, we're used to doing all the talking when it comes to guys so it's really nice when we meet a guy that has a bunch of stuff to say and questions to ask us (don't worry, it doesn't have to be anything special) instead of the other way around.