Boyfriend Overconsumed w/ Work Trying to Support his Family
Earlier this year, my boyfriend's mother had passed away. Since then, he's taken the responsibility for his family more seriously than ever. He's been busting his ass off at work left and right, trying to fight for every raise, paying for bills, trying to make sure his father feels accompanied at all times, and stressing about his income and monitoring his 401k and stocks 24/7. I also want to mention that he's only 22. He's extremely responsible and hardworking especially for his age, and though he probably will do this, I tell him 25 is wayy too young to be buying a house (which is the age he plans on doing so). Everything is in one ear out the other, and everytime I see him he's so frumpy from worrying and stressing out all the time. When I try to make him laugh, it doesn't even work anymore and better yet, my sarcasm makes him even more irritable because it translates to him that I can't be "mature" for being humorous when he has been working so hard. On top of that, my spendings and the fewer hours I work compared to him has somehow become his personal issue because its "money I could be saving" and "I could be making more money if I chose to work more hours" but I don't because to him money is not as important to me as it is for him and I take my income forgranted.
Obviously, I don't take any of that personally because I truly to love and care for him and I understand his sorrows. What makes me so concerned is that he stresses himself out to a point where he is making these comments towards me, as I would assume he normally would never do-- for his better sake, I never want him to have such feeling of negativity. I try to suggest we actively go out more, but he gets frustrated and looks at me as if I were a child always wanting to have fun and not take work seriously and that I'm not sympathetic or understanding of his feelings at all... which is no where near the point I'm trying to get across. My point is for HIM to have fun, but like I said, most things are in one ear and out the other lately.
As his girlfriend of two years, I have no means of leaving him at all. I just want to find a solution for him because his behavior has made me so worried about his health. I cry about it on my own because I'm afraid that if he sees how emotional I am, he will misconceive it as not being understanding, and it will simply just push him further away. So here is what I have to ask-- How do I effectively get him to understand how his behavior has been really worsening? What are some things or activities we could do to really get out there and leaving him feeling physically and mentally uplifting enough to convince him that he is working too hard and stressing too much?
